Back in the 80’s and 90’s, I used to do all my yearly layoffs on Christmas Day as I know all my employees would be home to take the landline message. -Ray

I took a little break from retirement to do a little “check in”. Unlike my competition, @CallahanAutoCo, I don’t sit around the office and make sock puppets and play pocket pool. We make car parts for the American working man and I’ll never stop Ray

PSA My youngest son, Rey, has quit his job at PetSmart and will now be working as a bouncer at a gay bar. It’s not the career I envisioned for him, as I hoped he would take over the family business but in hindsight I always knew he was a poof. Ray

Well said my good friend, @realDonaldTrump ! Ray

Because of my extreme wealth, I have been able to obtain a copy of @RockstarGTAV. I will be playing it with my grandson all weekend. Thanks. Ray

After his senate term is over, we will consider hiring @SenMcConnell to head our wholesale sales division at Zalinsky Auto Parts. Ray

Nobody wants to hear women reporters on sports sidelines.

It has come to my attention that Zalinsky Auto has been accused of being a racist company. I have instructed my new acting CEO to increase our number of black employees from 1.5% to 1.75%. Hope this makes everyone happy! Thanks. Ray

Mrs Zalinsky has been missing since 9am. My assistant, Audrina has been with me since noon looking for her all over the bedroom. Haven’t found her yet!

Our first take at a commercial we did in 2005

Just a piece of my collection at my Boca residence. I keep the modern cars at Zalinsky headquarters in Chicago. Mrs. Zalinksy #5 is not allowed in the collection room after what ex Mrs. Zalinksy #2 did in 1999. Ray

Exactly one week into my semi retirement (and near assassination) after I handed the company to my CFO and right hand man, Jack Hoff. I can lounge with no worries as Zalinksy Auto Parts is in good hands going forward. Thanks to Zalinksy customers for making a kid from Chicago’s auto empire dream come true.

I get home from playing 9 and Mrs. Zalinsky #5 just doesn’t stop talking about her day. This is not why I got married! Might quit this semi-retirement. Ray

The flock cameras are a great idea. Look what they caught outside my home in Boca. After my assassination attempt, I must always keep vigilant. Ray

My oldest grandson, Ray Zalinsky V, starts school at the prestigious Northwestern University on Monday. One day Ray will lead my company. My only hope is that he never hires my youngest son, Rey, his uncle.

Huge loser, @JBPritzker has officially lost the @ChicagoBears. Zalinsky Auto Parts may look elsewhere out of Chicago for our world headquarters as well. I’ve only kept the company in Chicago because, for years, I’ve loved my high rise office. Now I’m in Boca full time and may consider moving the company here. Ray

Good afternoon Zalinksy customers. Due to my recent assassination attempt (because he can’t honestly beat me in sales) by Tommy Callahan and Big Tom’s faithful virgin assistant, Richard, I will be stepping back from Zalinsky Auto Parts. My (very expensive) Indian doctor has advised me to take it easy. This being said, I will be spending more of my time in Boca and handing the reigns of the company to my right hand man of 27 years, Jack Hoff. Thanks. Ray

Zalinksy Auto Parts will be donating/distributing 100,000 parts catalogs to Chicago public schools for kids to bring home to their parents. This is how we serve the community. Ray