Incorrect BSD

Just a heads up: You guys are always welcome to DM me if you draw/make something based on one of these quotes, so I can RT. This account is always inundated in notifications, so it’s hard to keep up with things I’ve been tagged in. But I love to see your work!

Atsushi: I don’t want to hurt their feelings Akutagawa: Hurt their feel — do you just walk around all day thinking about other people’s feelings? Atsushi: Kind of, don’t you? Akutagawa: No? How do you get anything done?

Gogol: I turned out perfectly fine Fyodor: Just this morning you thought a ghost made your toast. Gogol: I didn't put the bread in! you didn't put the bread in!

Kenji: Okay, if someone held me by my throat, my top three cheeses are cheddar, swiss, and gouda Kyouka: As someone who has been held by the throat, cheese is not what they’re gonna ask about.

Dazai: Conflict and war is the crucible through which we evolve. Dazai: [eats Ranpo’s leftovers and places the empty container in Kunikida’s room]

Dazai: *accidentally brushes his hand against Chuuya’s hand* Chuuya: *aggressively takes hold of Dazai’s hand* Chuuya: Fucking commit to it.

Higuchi: How does the Armed Detective Agency always seem to know where we are?? Akutagawa: Chuuya, did you remember to set your Twitter to private? Chuuya: Akutagawa: Chuuya you set it to private right? Chuuya: Akutagawa: Chuuya

Police: You're arrested for reckless driving by having three people on one single motorcycle. Chuuya: God damn it. Chuuya: Chuuya: Wait, three? Police: ...yes, three? Akutagawa: Oh god Atsushi: DAZAI FUCKING FELL OFF

Kunikida: What's Dazai doing out there? Atsushi: I don’t know, it looks risky. Didn’t his ex-partner tie him up in a dungeon last time he was captured? Dazai: [banging pots together in front of the Mafia HQ] IT WOULD BE A SHAME IF I WERE ABDUCTED BY THE PORT MAFIA RIGHT NOW!!!!

Kunikida: Ah, Summer! The great outdoors! It’s so nice to have all this fresh air! Atsushi: There are bugs EVERYWHERE Dazai, tipping his hat to a mosquito: m’laria

Chuuya [Holding a knife to Dazai’s throat]: I should’ve killed you the last time we met. Dazai: Dazai: Are we about to kiss

Chuuya: You'd do that for me? Dazai: I'd do a lot of things to you. Chuuya: Y-… you mean for? For me? Dazai: Whatever, that too.

Atsushi: Why are you doing this?! Gogol [murdering people]: Same reason I do everything. To get everyone to like me

Katai: I'm head of my workspace, I’ve been that for several years now, and God I learned a lot of life lessons along the way! Kunikida: I thought your workspace was just you? Katai: Yes, Kunikida, but I am not easy to manage

Dazai: You have to treat a car like you treat a woman. Yosano: Go on. Dazai: …No. I sense I’ve made a mistake of some kind

Dazai: Have you ever been arrested? Fyodor: Yeah. Why? Dazai: I was going to say it's illegal to be this beautiful, but now I'm curious... Fyodor: I killed a guy.

[After Dead Apple] Atsushi: You mean to tell me you purposely went in there knowing you would be POISONED? Dazai: I knew Chuuya would come. Atsushi: POISONED. Dazai: If you fuck up and your partner unfucks your fuck up and nobody seen the fuckery, did you even fuck up at all?

Akutagawa: I would truly hate you if you weren’t charming, funny, sweet, and a genuinely good person. You’re very annoying. Atsushi: This is a confusing compliment.

Kunikida: Why are you late? Dazai: A technical error occurred causing an unexpectedly long bought of unconsciousness. Kunikida: You overslept? Dazai: I overslept.

Dazai: 'Person of interest' is almost too flattering. Dazai: Like, if the police were to pound on my door and go, “a man has been murdered in your building and you are a person of interest”, I'd be like, “moi? oh, do go on”