A useless bunch of aerosols who don't give a pschitt about your broadband problems. Support for British Terrorcoms. (Parody Account. Of course. Or is it?)
7th Circle Of Hell
Joined October 2010
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We Don't Care retweeted
Given up with #infinity from @btbusiness should have looked at tweets from @btcarenot first 7 missed appts took less time to find #BinLaden
Did You Know? The first ever broadband bit was sent 50 years ago. Bandwidth: 0.000003bps. Today we have doubled that. wp.me/p18JCO-y
News: We plan to include mobile calls in our pricing plans so your voice communications can be conducted extremely slowly too.
Current broadband failure is not - repeat is not - related to the ongoing alien invasion. Oops. We said too much.
If you are having broadband troubles, try first troubleshooting step: close your eyes, stamp your feet and say 'I do belive in fairies.'
Having speed problems with your broadband? Try our speed tips. #2: Lubricate the telephone socket with your tears of frustration.
Did You Know? A skilled telecoms engineer can install and configure ADSL2+ in under five minutes. Unfortunately none of ours are skilled.
Good news: melting snow has now thawed the internet. Bad news: it's waterlogged. Please place towels under your routers this week.
Snow and ice have frozen the bits in the tubes! We will be delivering your data by milkbottle - please thaw contents to access your email.
Service Update: Someone spilled coffee into a central router here. Internet will be jittery and irritable this evening for most of Cumbria.
@sallyanniegally Sorry, Sally, we book appts. the way we make promises about service & repairs: with no idea if it will actually work.
It's a beautiful sunny morning here in Hyderabad. SWINDON! A beautiful sunny AFTERNOON here in Swindon. Hope your internets are not broken.
Remember to tweet us your broadband queries and problems. We have a highly trained team who will pick a random answer out of a box for you.
Fat Jim had a huge weekend. He doesn't know what happened but when he woke up he was covered in fibre optic cable and no-one had broadband.
Broadband Speed Tip: Discourage disconnections by staring at the lights on your router or modem. Concentrate! The first to blink loses.
@GeeDonnieDarkoB Sorry for the delay in this reply but we can now officially blame Hurricane Irene.
Did You Know? A single fibre optic cable can provide 20Mbps broadband for up to 1200 housholds! It just can't be bothered.