Leg Day Enthusiast, Racoon Guy, Hot Bartender, Part-time Animal Wrangler

Arizona, USA
Joined April 2013
Co D. Ranks retweeted
You’ve been dicked by, you’ve been fucked by, my smooth genitals
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AND ALL I WANT IS A LITTLE RESTRAINT NOW
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my pride couldn’t accept “gave you this to watch you black out” costume. I’ll black out on my own terms.
What do you mean my coworker gave me a whole ass costume just because he “wants to see how hungover I show up to work tomorrow”
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Bartender at our after work hangout has agreed to sharpie the aforementioned phrase on my chest. Mission accomplished.
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What do you mean my coworker gave me a whole ass costume just because he “wants to see how hungover I show up to work tomorrow”
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Poor time management skills so I’m gonna have to show up straight from work to our Halloween party. Looks like I’m taking my shirt off and writing “I Came in My Pants” on my chest in sharpie.
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oh she’s so wet… dripping
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Blind Melon's "No Rain" still sneaks up on you. Shannon's sitting on the floor with that long hair in his face, singing like he's talking to one person instead of a room. The song is so light and bouncy on the surface that you almost miss how lonely the words are. "All I can say is that my life is pretty plain" over that sunny little groove is one of the best tricks 90s rock ever pulled. The Bee Girl video made it famous, but the actual performance just feels like a guy who means every line. Still hits the same way now.
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When it hit the chorus and the dollhouse scene it immediately unlocked a memory
Otro de los Groovies más recordados de Cartoon Network es este de Ed, Edd y Eddy con la canción "I'm Not Coming In Anymore" de Garrett Freireich. Salió en CN en el año 2002 y en América Latina se vio hasta 2005, aproximadamente. ¿Quiénes recuerdan a los Groovies?
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Might crank it one more time
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Co D. Ranks retweeted
twitter says I liked your post but actually I loved it I love you
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Co D. Ranks retweeted
"two likes isnt a lot" imagine two beautiful women conspiring to take advantage of you
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I had to listen to jay feely apply taking hits on the football field to politics like he wasn’t a fucking kicker
For the love of Christ get these fucking political ads off the goddamn TV during football games
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I’ve had too good of a day today so I’m listening to yellow is the color of her eyes by soccer mommy and intentionally sabotaging my emotional wellbeing
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Off early on a Saturday, if anybody needs me, I will be getting incredibly toasted and playing RuneScape for the remainder of the evening
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Co D. Ranks retweeted
Turnstile at the Washington Monument today, a benefit show raising money for humanitarian aid in Palestine, Sudan, and Lebanon [📹: Ayman Abdeldayem]
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Obama has been pulling his punches less and less recently and it’s so fun to watch
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Please don’t Andrew Luck, Justin Herbert. Give bro a break 😭
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crankin it
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