Matty

I'm the funniest person that I know

AND IM THE FUCKIN BEST BOWLER IN TEH WORLD @Alex_lyman

.@Alex_lyman IM FUCKIN RELATED TO VAN GOGH

.@Alex_lyman does this make you cringe?

She hates my love for chimmi changas!

I want all of the heat peanuts in my mouth

Heat Peanuts are so delicious.

By the end of the year I won't ever have to go anywhere, there will be an app for everything

I love @Postmates Bout to try @ChronicTacosLB Excited!

Are the beaches longer in Long Beach?

.@Alex_lyman I'm the only one that liked this. That means that everyone else loves me 😃

Hi

This doesn't just affect America. it affects the entire world. I'd love to crack a joke about It, but it's really quite terrifying.

This is not real. – at Magna, UT

We live in a very interesting time. – at Magna, UT

If @BernieSanders was our nominee to begin with.. it would be a different ball game right now. – at Magna, UT

You know you're old when you fill a prescription at Wagreens and you get one of those reward coupons for an AARP discount.. @joey2fast – at Magna, UT

Dragonite 2 Matty 0 – at Magna, UT

It's crazy to think that my first tour with these guys was more than 5 years ago.. Time passes… instagram.com/p/BJQjpjbhGSk/