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"Cooler heads will prevail," I whisper, as I place the last of the heads into the cooler
'dro🐰 retweeted
Hey what's that movie where Russell Brand acts like an oversexed clueless jackass for 90 minutes
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Feeling bad for people on the right today. Also people on the left. And people on neither side as well. Just covering all my bases.
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Just learned you can review bridges. What are you even expecting beyond getting to the other side
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Optometrist clearly flirting with me (“those look great on you” “color kind of matches your eyes” “debit or credit?”).
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I've made peace with my enemies. Jessica from fourth grade, Matt from fourth grade, Andrew from fourth gr


















