The Proof A confession: my natural instinct under pressure is STILL to do more. The difference nowadays is that I am catching it! When I feel the urge to take something back, I ask: "Am I doing this because it's mine to do or because it's comfortable?" Usually, it's comfortable. And that answers tells me everything I need to know about what I get to choose to BECOME, rather than simply do more.

The Question (Poll time!) When growth stalls, what's your first instinct? 1. Work more hours? 2. Hire more help? 3. Change the strategy? 4. Look at myself?

How do you know when you are living and leading authentically?

The Lesson Most founders I work with hit a ceiling and respond the same way: more hours, more effort, more of themselves. I call this the "effort trap" or the "trying more trap." It's the most natural and deceptive mistake a capable leader can make, because effort is what worked on the way up. If you're curious if you're "in it", here's some evidence - Revenue is flat or slow, but your hours keep climbing - You're the first one people call for every problem. - Vacations feel risky, not restful (and you're working while you're on them) - You feel busy and behind at the same time. (Or bored and overwhelmed at the same time). Why more effort stops working: at a certain size, the business is not limited by how much YOU do. It is limited by how many people can do great work WITHOUT you. Your extra hours don't raise that number. In reality, they oftentimes lower it, because every problem you solve is one your team didn't learn to solve themselves. The shift happens when you go from being the person who does THE MOST to becoming someone a team can and wants to grow under. Here's what this looks like this week (if you care to take a shot at it): 1. List the 5 things you did last week that only felt urgent because you are the one who always does them. 2. Pick one and hand it to someone with the outcome, not the steps. 3. When they bring it back imperfect, coach them rather than re-doing it. The next level of your organization and leadership isn't built around doing more. It is built by you becoming more.

The Pattern More hours got you here. More hours won't get you there.

The Proof: One of my clients grew his business 50% this calendar year. With two months left, he is going for 100%. Next year, he wants to experience 150%. I assure you, he didn't accomplish any of this by simply working harder. He got there by believing he is the leader who can build a team, lead them, and develop them. He is not an imposter or accidentally in charge. He never was.

I am a former pastor on sabbatical right now. In my 18 years of leading a church I never once needed to tell people to vote. Why? Because I focused on shepherding people toward Jesus and believing that the Holy Spirit would work in believers in whatever ways were necessary to bring about Christlikeness. Oh yeah, I have never once feared the outcome of an election. Why? Kingdoms rise and kingdoms fall yet the Kingdom and people of God remain through it all.

The Question: What is one thing your business is ready for that you have not believed you are ready for?

I am officially one week into X and a couple notices... 1. There is a crap load of crap on this platform. Hucksters galore. 2. There are leaders here that are creating content that is meant to be sat with and considered, not reacted to. Thank you to the many who are adding value to human flourishing through thoughtfulness. 3. I get to choose which of the above two I dabble with. And I do dabble with both. I call out crap when I see it and read it (likely for the development of my call-out-crap-muscle) and engage with others who are challenging my thinking and helping me to grow into the version of myself I desire to be. 4. This platform is more fun than the others. IMO.

How are you SEEING?

The Lesson: A gap I see in growing companies I work with... the business is ready for the next level before the leader believes they are. Revenue is growing. The team is growing. The opportunities are getting bigger. But inside, the founder is still running the old story through their head. "I got lucky. I'm a doer, not a leader. Sooner or later someone will find out I should not be here." That story leaks (and wreaks) out in predictable ways: (1) Leaders keep the hardest work for themselves, because they trust their hands more than their leadership and delegation. (2) They hire people "to help," not to lead, so every decision still comes back to them. (3) They set goals that match their confidence, not what their company is capable of. (Comfort over growth). Just to be clear, this is not a strategy problem. This is identity stuff. And, breakthrough isn't learning a new skill. It is deciding who you are right now. Not who you were when you started, but the leader this business needs. (Ex: I am a courageous and powerful leader.) Here are 3 questions to imagine that version of yourself. (1) If your company were run by someone you deeply respect and trust, what they would stop doing tomorrow? What would they start doing tomorrow? And what, specifically, would be the new results? Answer honestly. You'll likely walk away with something you can commitment to immediately.

The Pattern Your business can outgrow your belief in yourself. Most founders notice the first part long before the second.

I believe we grow in anything by acts of that very thing. Want to grow in courage? Commit to actions aligned with courage. Want to grow in assertiveness. Commit to acts aligned with being assertive. I not only lead and coach leaders this way, I often remind my sons of this principle. Tonight, my eldest scored the sudden death game winning basket in triple overtime of his club basketball game (yup… sudden death at 11 years old). This came after missing two game winning free throws just a few minutes before. After the game, he pointed out that his team could’ve won sooner had he made those free throws. I then started to ask him… “How do learn to make game winning shots?” He knew the answer. “By taking game winning shots.” He had put himself in a position to take those first shots which gave him the confidence to take the final shot when it truly mattered most. If you want to grow in anything, you need to take the shot.

I watched a father pray over his oldest son yesterday. The son then turned and prayed over his younger brother. They were parting ways for the day’s various sports happenings for the family. It was one of the most powerful displays of leadership I have seen in all my life. And I am not prideful enough to say I desire that same kind of intentionality and love for my sons. Grateful to have been a witness.

One of the simplest ways our family has conversations about Jesus has been through watching The Chosen together. As the next season is soon to be released, we are watching the current episodes. My boys’ curiosity is a gift.

Be people who create value and you'll be a value add to every space and relationship you're part of. Take it or leave it... if you will shift how you relate to value, you'll create value in any and all circumstances in your life. And you'll be better for it too.

What are questions you ask yourself or others have asked you that have you exploring and mining the answers?

Who are your WE helping you to become, grow, and transform? As a pastor of 18 years, I was surrounded by loads of people who looked like my WE. And then I had six months of dark suicidal ideation. I shared it with none of my WE. That was on ME. The moment I brought my WE into the ME game, everything changed. Just because you're living amongst a WE does not mean you're living the WE game. Invite them into hearing you, experiencing the authentic you, and sharing feedback with you. Don't know how to ask for feedback or share? DM me, I'll provide you a framework to dial up your WE game and, as a result, your life.

One of the greatest leadership challenges: EVERY leader vastly underestimates what they are capable of. Ask me how.

If you’re a parent of a high school student and wanting to help them think through what to pursue in life that’s aligned to more than just “whatever makes money,” find where these three things intersect in your child’s life: 1. Natural talents that can be developed into strengths 2. What they are passionate about (willing to suffer discomfort in growth and transformation to experience) 3. The opportunities that naturally arise from the top two that account for multiple options creating excitement.