Dovid Goldstein

I feel bad for Yayin Nesech. Poor wine.

When you're out of pickles and you need a pickle - you're in a pickle.

I put my shoe on the wrong foot and right foot at the same time. It was my left shoe.

Each and every one of you count! And you know why?? Since you learned numbers in kindergarten.

May you be subscribed and liked for a good year in the ways of chassidus!

I like to address Rabbi's wearing bow ties as Rabotai.

How to save $5 shopping anywhere: Go to any store, find something you want for $15. Hesitate for 7 seconds and decide you don't want to waste money on that. Now find something else that's only $10 and get it, and hey you saved $5! Works every time!

I had so many friends on Twitter (ob"m), they now now my x-friends.

Did you know that July 4, 1776 fell out on 17 Tammuz?

Some say Moshe only lightly hit the rock, since some Yidden requested tap water.

My dream is to wake up early...

You can get under the weather and over a cold, but not over the weather or under a cold 🤔

Rashi and the Balei Tosfos might argue a lot, but at least they're on the same page.

Why can you just say a joke without saying "this was a joke", but by a pun you say "pun (not) intended".. something to pontificate about...

What do you call a cow that's a baal mum? Sub-par.

TFW different people on WhatsApp send the same message at the same time for totally different reasons..

A few guys decided they'll be quiet during davening this week.. I think they're just a bunch of big talkers.

A guy a know never kept his promises. His name was Billy Nader.