Tim Houston - Premier of Nova Scotia parody

Announcing Mööber! Our moose-powered rideshare is an eco-friendly, sustainable alternative to cars. We’re training Nova Scotia’s moose population to carry passengers along rural roads and Halifax streets. Had one too many wobbly pops? Missed the school bus? Call a Mööber!

Now that I’ve saved public education, I’m winding down watching Book Club. Candice Bergen. Mary Steenburgen. Lots of Bergen’s or Burgens’. Plus Diane Keaton and Jane Fonda so I’m a big fan of this shit.

The future of public education starts right here in Nova Scotia.

“Roads? Where you’re going, you don't need roads.” RIP Patrick Stewart #StarWars

Look @DaveRitcey. We don’t want small businesses building more grow ops and who the hell is Ed?

So let me get this straight. The story here is how two unauthorized, older women who happen to be recognizable award winning journalists were able to bypass security controls at a federally regulated $10 billion industrial site. Is that really the angle they’re going with? -ND

Affordable housing? Transparency? Environmental protections? Jobs?

Introducing my official tartan kilt. Woven with my face, stitched with my vision, and priced at $499.99 because I refuse to let affordability interfere with innovation. Other premiers simply build a legacy. I put mine on your arse. You're welcome.

I wish the media would stop finding out what we’re up to especially when it’s about us preventing the public from finding out what we’re up to.

Played hide the ironing board this week. I lost because I don’t know what an ironing board looks like.

I’d buy and give away so much merch.

So with all that Nova Scotia Guard merch nobody bothered to save me a ball cap ferfucksakes.

She totally believes me. #nspoli

Cash deal too.

Electric vehicle owners are gonna pay one way or the other. The bicycle crowd? You’re next.

My government is committed to affordable housing. That's why we're encouraging every Nova Scotian to install a mini AI data centre in their living room. It’ll heat your home. It’ll need 50 kW/hr. It’ll tell you where your family can sleep. The future of housing has arrived!

Proud to welcome @AirCanada to the MacKay Bridge as our first corporate sponsor. Making sure Nova Scotians never confuse public service with a pleasant experience.

Marco MacLeod has stepped down so he can learn and grow. I’ve stepped back into the Minster of Energy role because apparently the only thing this government knows how to generate reliably is another cabinet vacancy FFS. #nspoli

My government’s research scientists have estimated that 431,328,552 people have had sex at least one time to MC Hammer’s Have You Seen Her? In case you want to know our priorities and stuff.