Emily Luftov

This is a MAJOR problem with Stay at Home Moms (SAHM) , and I'm sorry ladies but the problem is very likely YOU. First off, it goes without saying that childbirth and breastfeeding is an incredible strain on the mother and women are amazing for doing it. But, I'm sorry, NO childcare is not an equal trade for your husbands job. I see this all the time with friends and other dads online. The mom equates raising the kid with the man's job, and then believes the rest of the duties should be split. Ur completely delusional. Childcare is valued at $2000-$2500/mo. It's a minimum wage job. A house cleaner is valued at $2800/mo. It's also around a minimum wage job. So combine them both together and the value the SAHM is contributing to the household is around $60k/yr. Guess what? If you are a SAHM, your husband is likely pulling in $150k/yr+. So the market is saying your husbands work (after taxes) is TWICE as valuable as you raising the kid and doing ALL the house chores. It's priceless that you get to raise your kid and give them a ton of attention that they wouldn't get at daycare. It's priceless that you're husband makes enough that it's even possible for you to be a SAHM. Meanwhile, I see dad's contributing more than ever. I personally wake up, make the kids breakfast, take them to school, do a full-time job, and then try to help out around the house some when I get home. I take the kids to dance and sports after work. And I know for many other dad's with SAHM, they are doing this too. And it's so sad the amount of times I hear SAHM leave the laundry, the dishes, all the house chores to be done after the husband gets home from work. Because "childcare is a full-time job" and the rest should be 50/50. No ladies, go get a $150k/yr+ job, put your kid in daycare, and then the rest can be 50/50. This woman's example is extreme, at least how she's framing it, but sorry ladies, the problem is indeed you in about 80% of these situations.