Sleep MD turned Sleep Coach | Created BedTyme app | Author of Tales of Courage | Co-founded The Sleep Coach School
Eugene, OR
Joined September 2018
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Dear everyone,
If you know anyone who’s wondered how insomnia ends, and would like tenth-six (!) stories of exactly that…
…please tell them about this brand new book! 🤗🙏
amazon.com/Tales-Courage-Twe…
It’s been said almost nothing of what we worry about happens.
Our brain warning us when there’s no threat is a feature of being human.
We could say:
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice shame on me. Fool me countless times, shame on nobody.
Daniel Erichsen retweeted
One of the most perplexing things about insomnia for me was how it could go away for weeks, (or even months at a time), only to come back for no apparent reason.
This podcast is for anyone going through a cyclical experience with insomnia:
bethkendall.com/blog/why-doe…
Daniel Erichsen retweeted
To get beyond insomnia, you really only need to change two things:
- Your focus
- Your responses
Then sleep will take care of itself.
I just hear a fellow sleep coach say “that’s ultimate surrender, it’s what sets us free”, which sounded odd.
Aren’t we going to be captured if we surrender?
But no, because with the inner struggle there is no actual enemy.
Surrender is what sets us free.
If it’s clear to us that what we resist persists (and what we don’t resist doesn’t), then maybe instead of stress management courses and relaxation techniques we ought to develop:
- stress acceptance courses
- anxiety welcoming techniques
Just saying…
Wow. This is the type of insight that I believe cannot keep us from seeing through insomnia and leaving the struggle. Paradoxically.
With an inner struggle like insomnia, with no actual threat but only a perceived threat (wakefulness) - trying to escape reinforces the idea that we are in danger.
In other words:
Pursuing safety is the greatest risk.
One of many, many paradoxes in our space.
Insomnia happens when our brain classifies being awake as a threat.
Sensing a threat, we become more vigilant, more awake, confirming that we indeed are in danger.
Which in reality isn’t the case.
There’s just been a misclassification. Insomnia is a misunderstanding.
However, this is not how insomnia is generally understood.
Rather insomnia is thought of as a sleep disorder.
Which in reality it isn’t.
There’s nothing wrong with our sleep when we have insomnia, we are simply kept awake as our brain believes we are threatened.
A guest on our YouTube channel, Daniel, sharing how they left insomnia said:
“Fear doesn’t stop death, fear stops life from occurring.”
There’s something very true there isn’t it?
Would we be anxious if our brain didn’t perceive a threat?
If the answer is no, then perhaps what matters when we struggle with anxiety is not to attempt to turn this safety emotion off, but to find the object or experience that has been labeled dangerous.
When we understand that sleep is a passive and that everything we do to achieve sleep IS why we’re not getting any - it can seem like we need to drop ALL attempts to sleep immediately.
But that’s now what I’ve seen.
Rather, a little effortlessness can go a looong way.
This never ceases to amaze me:
You can start with panic, insomnia or any other version of the inner struggle, and arrive at the exact same answers.
Turns out this is true for dizziness as well.
youtu.be/Qeq98pl4a24?si=QFOA…
We have seen that what truly leads away from sleep struggles is understanding that being awake is not a threat, that anxiety represents no danger.
Understanding that comes from self-exploration, from an inner journey of discovery and enlightenment.
It sounds impossible, but I believe this is true.
We have many students who sleep every night, but their days are still consumed with worries about not sleeping.
They still have insomnia.