First Order Press Secretary. Supreme Leader Snoke is dead. Long live the Supreme Leader. Star Wars parody
Joined February 2018
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FO Press Secretary retweeted
Look, we'd love to NOT kill all of the Jedi, we really would, but it's the LAW and everyone knows the Emperor can't arbitrarily change a law he's arbitrarily made... unless he really wants to. Which he doesn't.
General Hax has said something well for once in his life. nitter.gq/AngryGenHux/status/100…
Not that it matters, but SL never force choked the head investigator because of the collusion investigation. It was over a different matter entirely!
Please welcome our new press bullpen intern, Darth Derpidious Beluga. She is wearing uniform Darth Vader #5 robes.
There will be no special Mothers’ Day mail delivery for stormtroopers. Your mothers sold you to the First Order for an extra ration and a half. Supreme Leader is your mother now. #HappyMothersDay
In response to the recent (overwhelmingly negative) coverage of the Snoke murder collusion investigation, Supreme Leader has revoked all media licenses. All headlines now require direct approval from SL.
Supreme Leader is still investigating the mysterious outbreak of lisps. #maythefifthprevail
Calendars marked, sir. Blasters at the ready. nitter.gq/DepressedDarth/status/…
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FO Press Secretary retweeted
Remembering the day Darth Vader broke down on the Forth Road Bridge
#MayTheForthBeWithYou #MayTheFourthBeWithYou #StarWarsDay
The Supreme Leader has assembled a special task force to investigate—everyone seems to have developed a slight lisp today. #MayTheFourthBeWithYou
FO Press Secretary retweeted
Yes, blowing up Alderaan was probably awful BUT have you heard the mean jokes this leftist comedian made about Darth Vader? #Disgrace
The trifecta’s dopurrgangers. nitter.gq/BadMotherLeia/status/9…
FO Press Secretary retweeted
ugh i hate this picture
it doesnt even get my good side
the dark side
#OldHeadshotDay
The benefits of working for the SL are indeed superior to anything the rebel scums can offer. nitter.gq/DepressedDarth/status/…
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SL has consistently held to his claims that there was no collusion with the Jakku rebel girl. I for one, see no reason to doubt him.
FO Press Secretary retweeted
For the last time, Leader Snoke was killed by the Jedi girl alone! There was NO COLLUSION in any PHONY HUT INVESTIGATION.
FO Press Secretary retweeted
I agree with Sean Hannity. What part of I tripped and fell unconscious while the girl Rey killed Snoke and 8 guards by herself is so hard to understand?
FO Press Secretary retweeted
Of course I support #womenintech. You think that idiot Han Solo bypassed the compressor?
