Have you lost someone you can't live without? Salt Water is a blog, online community & resource for those who are grieving. #binders
Joined January 2017
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"Closure is a myth, I’m learning. A story we tell ourselves in the hope that it will prove to be true. We might get over a lost job, a major move, even a broken relationship but not the death of one of our essential people."
findyourharbor.com/the-black…
"So what do we have left to grab onto, if nothing truly holds? The day before the accident, Harry & I talked about mundane things .. There was no way to know it was the last time I’d see him that way."
time.com/article/2026/08/08/…
"I will always be the woman whose 1st child died & I won’t give up either the grievance or the bad jokes of everyday life. I will hold onto both forever. I want a book that acknowledges life goes on but that death goes on, too ..."
~Elizabeth McCracken
npr.org/2009/01/02/98610156/…
"And so I trudge on, walking in the shadow of grief, carrying Jimmy's spirit to light my way forward. Leaving a ghost light on in the space he should be occupying so others can know him, too. Hoping that he will see it and emerge from the darkness ..."
findyourharbor.com/ghost-lig…
For rushing past too much of your life,
moments you thought would come again
& those you came to appreciate only in hindsight, I forgive you.
For saying yes when you wanted to say no
... prioritized something
or someone that didn’t matter or didn’t care.
findyourharbor.com/pardon/
"There is so much of those early weeks that I do not remember. I wonder now if you, too, went searching all over the house for her, not finding her. I did not need to wonder whether you were grieving her. I knew. Your person was gone."
findyourharbor.com/our-girl/
I walk to find the stillness, molecules of time away from the shattering. The solitude interrupts my sadness, creating space where I can begin to make sense of my out-of-order loss, keep moving into this aftermath life & find a way forward without my son.
findyourharbor.com/walking-t…
"He was of course, a piece of the sky. His eyes said so. This is not fact: this is the other part of knowing something, when there is no proof. Neither is there any way toward disbelief. Imagine lifting the lid from a jar and finding it not filled with darkness but with light."
Writer or not, poet or not, "Saved by the Beauty of the World" will speak to you, move you. Just like Mary Oliver's poetry, it's the reminder about the beauty that remains, even now, that we all need.
youtube.com/watch?v=hCyw9F4t…
"A lot of what is happening in grieving is actually not about verbal processing,” said Mary-Frances O’Connor, author of 'The Grieving Body.'
Walking & running saved me after Jimmy died. To find an E-Motion group near you, click the link in the comments.
wapo.st/4gxsY6P
"Perhaps part of the healing is lying in the darkness, sitting with that black grief, absorbing the magnitude of all that is lost. Maybe there's no way to get to gratitude without that. To a place where the remembering is even possible ..."
findyourharbor.com/a-box-ful…
"Just as each of us love & grieve uniquely so, too, are the answers we offer to the burning question we most want to avoid. Crafting a response takes time and practice. We make mistakes and try again. We determine how much we want to reveal and to whom."
findyourharbor.com/the-choic…
"All signs pointed to a perfect day. Family. Ceremony. Eulogies. As the piper, once again I peered through a window into the life of a family I did not know but came to appreciate for the stories they told."
~ Brenda Jacobsen
findyourharbor.com/knotted-n…
"I started to notice just how quiet our house had become. The way the silence seemed to swell with his absence. The missing notes in our family’s symphony. Jimmy’s laughter mingling with Dan’s .. His baritone blending with Molly’s higher pitched voice .."
findyourharbor.com/the-sound…
"And I didn’t go buy fireworks today.
Not yesterday, either. Nor will
I buy them tomorrow because you
will not be here to light them.
I realize now what I loved about fireworks
was how much you loved them ..."
~ Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer
ahundredfallingveils.com/202…
"Although everyone’s expiration date is stamped somewhere,
in a place we cannot see,
most of us will never notice the end coming,
not knowing when or how we’ll leave the world
what will remain undone, unsaid, unresolved when we go."
findyourharbor.com/expiratio…
"When his cup of cranberry apple juice arrived, I quietly put it into the drink recess on his tray and returned to my book. Thirty minutes later, I bolted upright as icy cold liquid cascaded down my left leg and began pooling at my feet.
findyourharbor.com/kindness/
"I knew the pain of losing Jimmy would be searing, no matter when or how it happened. But there in the dark, I vow to make it worth the pain. To fight like hell to keep him alive as long as I can. To be present for all those sweet moments of ordinary joy."
findyourharbor.com/enough/
