Get lost in what you love💕...
Joined August 2024
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Shee retweeted
Host: Hold on! Before we get to the interview, who approved that dress? I need their name!
Woman: (Laughs) Why? Are you planning to file a complaint?
Host: I'm planning to file a complaint with the fashion department! You walked in here looking like the grand finale of a fashion show!
Audience: Bursts into laughter.
Woman: Well, I didn't come here to blend in with your curtains.
Host: Ouch! That's the first personal attack of the evening, and we're barely two minutes in!
Woman: You started it. I was sitting here minding my business.
Host: Minding your business? You walked onto my stage wearing a dress with more plot twists than a Netflix thriller!
Audience: Roars with laughter.
Woman: At least my dress has a storyline. What's the excuse for that tie?
Host: (Looks down at his tie) Excuse me! This tie has been professionally selected!
Woman: By someone who clearly doesn't like you.
Audience: Explodes with laughter.
Host: WOW! Somebody get her a microphone and give me a glass of water. I'm getting destroyed on my own show!
Woman: (Smirks) You invited me. Don't start regretting your decisions now.
Host: Trust me, I'm already having a meeting with my booking manager tomorrow!
Woman: Just admit you like the dress.
Host: I like the dress! I just don't understand how you managed to make an entire fashion statement with approximately three buttons and a prayer!
Audience: Erupts in laughter.
Woman: And yet you've spent the entire interview talking about it. Sounds like the dress is doing a better job than your questions.
Host: (Raises his hands) Ladies and gentlemen, she's beautiful, she's confident, and apparently, she's also unemployed as a guest because she's taken over the entire show!
Woman: Don't worry. I'll send you my hosting invoice.
Host: An invoice?! After what you've done to my confidence? I should be sending YOU a bill for emotional damages!
Audience: Cheers and applauds.
Woman: (Laughing) You're welcome. Consider it entertainment!
Host: Well, one thing is certain. That dress deserves its own guest chair next time!
Woman: Only if you promise not to interview it.
Host: I wouldn't dare. It looks like it has sharper comebacks than you do!
Audience: Bursts into laughter and applause.
Shee retweeted
It's been over 7 years together right? It's not an act at this point. They love each other, just be cool with that. Kylie Jenner and Timothee Chalamet showing some ❤️🇺🇸
Shee retweeted
They chased the crystal skull through the Amazon—until the jungle’s man-eating ants made them the treasure.
Shee retweeted
My neighbor reported my backyard renovation to the city because I refused to let her use it for her daughter’s engagement party. Now she’s furious because the inspection uncovered something on her own property.
I bought my house four years ago outside Raleigh. First backyard I’ve ever been proud of. Took almost three years of weekends and saving. Finished the covered patio this spring. I’m 38, divorced, live alone, work in insurance. This house is the biggest thing I’ve accomplished. Most of my extra money went into it………..
Shee retweeted
Behind the doors of a lavish estate, a housemaid uncovers chilling secrets that transform her dream job into a desperate fight for survival. The Housemaid🎬
Shee retweeted
Surgeon: “Your mother’s surgery is scheduled for 7 a.m. tomorrow. She must not eat or drink after midnight.”
Daughter: “Doctor, can we postpone it until next week? We haven’t paid the remaining $8,000.”
Surgeon: “Her condition requires timely treatment. Delaying could put her at greater risk.”
Daughter: “I understand, but the hospital says they need payment before the operation. We’ve already sold her car and borrowed money from relatives.”
Surgeon: “Have you spoken to the financial assistance department?”
Daughter: “Three times. They keep transferring me between offices. Yesterday, someone told me the payment had to be completed before they could even review our application.”
The surgeon paused.
Surgeon: “Let me speak with the hospital administrator. I can explain why delaying this procedure concerns me.”
The following morning, the daughter arrived at the hospital expecting another argument about money…
Shee retweeted
If this is how football is played, then I'd rather be a spectator ⚽
Shaolin monks have officially changed the rules of the game. Who needs VAR when you have these skills🎞️🎞️
