Author of the #AllensburyMysteries Baker of the World's Best Brownies and corned beef pie. https://nitter.gq/t.co/co8PTyXlev
London
Joined August 2010
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If you're taking refuge (or not) from the #FIFAWorldCup in crime fiction, then I have an offer for you.
As football is now a game of four quarters (apparently), you can get 25% off everything in my shop when you use the code WORLDCUP26
payhip.com/LMMilfordBooks
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Today's book and a beer is back on the terrace (by that I mean patio) and is sponsored by Angelo Porreti and @kateellisauthor
#amreading
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If you're taking refuge (or not) from the #WorldCup2026FIFA in crime fiction, then I have an offer for you.
As football is now a game of four quarters (apparently), you can get 25% off everything in my shop when you use the code WORLDCUP26
payhip.com/LMMilfordBooks
Today's beer and a book is sadly indoors as it looks like rain. But it's sponsored by Angelo Porreti and @tawilliamsbooks - seems appropriate to have an Italian beer to accompany an Italian murder mystery!
Lynne Milford retweeted
Would anyone like to buy an eBook 🙏 All for charity!
Thirteen Deadly Intentions is out now on ebook 🥳 (paperbacks coming soon).
13 brilliant crime stories and advice on writing crime fiction.
All royalties are going to Invest in ME Research.
Grab your copy here:
https:// amazon.co.uk/dp/B0H3HXY2GH
#ThirteenDeadlyIntentions
How did I not know about The Read on @BBCiPlayer ? Like Jackanory for grown ups! Superb performance by Luke Thompson in The Picture of Dorien Gray bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/m0… #amreading
I'm so glad to be a part of this project. In A Deadly Deal, Dan and Ed are in Cadiz on a town twinning visit. But murder and mayhem aren't far behind! #amreading
Thirteen Deadly Intentions is out now on ebook 🥳 (paperbacks coming soon).
13 brilliant crime stories and advice on writing crime fiction.
All royalties are going to Invest in ME Research.
Grab your copy here:
https:// amazon.co.uk/dp/B0H3HXY2GH
#ThirteenDeadlyIntentions
Lynne Milford retweeted
Raising a glass to our chums at @3CPublishingUK to celebrate @VictoriaGoldma2 's success in the @The_CWA Whodunnit Dagger shortlist! Onward and upward to a win!
Today's beer and a book is sponsored by @medwardsbooks and Angelo Porreti lager. Perfect for the lovely sunny day 😎
Who knew the River Tees could look so lovely? Happy Friday afternoon (in the pub beer garden) to everyone!
Today's Beer and A Book features @VaseemKhanUK and a @Heineken Zero on the sunny terrace outside my house (it's more of a patio but terrace sounds better!) #amreading
The first beer-and-a-book on the patio this year. Accompanied by @MarionETodd - in a manner of speaking #amreading
Lynne Milford retweeted
#WorldBookNight is just one sleep away 😴
If you know someone who could benefit from the power of reading, invite them to celebrate World Book Night! 🌘
👉 worldbooknight.org/resources
#GoAllIn2025 #NationalYearOfReading2026 @Go_All_In_2026
It's a sad state of affairs when you've written yourself a note and cannot read it back. Oh dear. Hopefully it wasn't too important... #amwriting
Go and read this book now. It's fantastic and has a well deserved place on that list!
If you need a good giggle today, this will do it 😁
Things I have learned from the movies"
Having watched hundreds of movies, they have taught me many things that I would like to share with you today:
1. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the year.
2. All beds have special L-shaped top sheets that reach up to armpit level on a woman but only waist level on the man lying beside her.
3. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.
4. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving.
5. The ventilation system of any building is a perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building without difficulty.
6. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do.
7. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window of any building in Paris.
8. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.
9. When paying for a taxi, never look at your wallet as you take out a note - just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.
10. If you lose a hand, it will cause the stump of your arm to grow by 15cm.
11. Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning, even though the husband and children never have time to eat them.
12. Cars and trucks that crash will almost always burst into flames.
13. A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a football stadium.
14. Medieval peasants had perfect teeth.
15. All single women have a cat.
16. Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.
17. One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at one.
18. Creepy music coming from a graveyard should always be closely investigated.
19. Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper cuttings - especially if any of their family or friends has died in a strange boating accident.
20. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessor.
21. During a very emotional confrontation, instead of facing the person you are speaking to, it is customary to stand behind them and talk to their back.
22. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.
23. Dogs always know who's bad and will naturally bark at them.
24. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other.
25. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch-enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gases, lasers and man eating sharks that will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape.
26. Having a job of any kind will make all fathers forget their son's eighth birthday.
27. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off.
28. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.
29. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
30. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
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