64 player who will go to Super Nova only to play friendlies on their offline emulator set up.

64 player who doesn't offer gas money after winning the local vs the player who is driving them home.

Melee player who looks at SSC 2023 results and thinks "nah, this won't prove my point. Let me keep looking."

64 player whose entire identity is being slightly above average with a character no one likes to use or fight against.

64 player who only thinks to ask for a player's tag during friendlies when they realize they aren't bad at the game.

64 player who runs to the other side of the stage immediately after taking taking Yoshi's double jump and sending them off to show how aware they are of the visual and audio cues of Yoshi djc.

Online player who plays bad team characters like Yoshi, Puff, and Fox to prove they are good in teams but never ends up proving the point.

64 player who only plays other smash games enough to validly criticize them and then never touches them again.

Online player who is trying to change their toxic ways.

64 player who wants to do well in singles today but the alcohol keeps calling.

64 player who skips the matches they lost when they are rewatching their tournament sets.

64 player who compliments emotionally unstable players so they don't kill themselves outside of the game.

64 player who thinks seeding is wrong because they've played that person in friendlies and the matches were closer than with the other person who is seeded lower.

64 player who thinks calling people who are uninterested in entering major brackets "scared" is viable reverse psychology.

64 player who will inevitably lead the "Pikachu loses to Yoshi" campaign in 2023.

Online player who can't let go of the old days and is always referencing players who no one else remembers.

64 player who is already thinking about their pre johns for smash con.

64 player who complains about a broken character but only complains about the things that don't actually make the character broken.

64 player who is confirmed for SSC but still hasn't registered because he doesn't like being told what to do.