The Question Film

As polarization gets worse and we become increasingly unable to understand the views of the "other side," we also become more likely to see their views as not being genuine. We'll often think people on the "other side" are being deceptive about their views. We'll often think they're trying to "gaslight" us by not recognizing things we see as obvious and self-evident. While of course some people will be doing these deceptive and bad-faith things, it's also true that we'll often be wrong about these views of the "other side" simply because we find it so hard to understand their perspectives (as they can find it hard to understand ours). For these reasons, if we care about overcoming our toxic divisions, we should see it as important to err on the side of engaging in good faith, and treat people as if they genuinely believe what they say they believe. This will sometimes require much humility and patience because our views can be so far apart. We'll often find ourselves thinking "they can't possibly really believe these things." But engaging in good faith, as much we're able to, is one way we draw each other closer and mend the chasms between us. It's one way we can start to pull our hugely divergent, conflicting narratives a little closer together.

One reason this is important: Us-vs-them animosity will lead us to often misinterpret and over-react to stories, and the "other side" will see that and use it as evidence for why our group is unreasonable and dangerous. Our too-quick reactions can contribute to polarization.

When we criticize behaviors we see as unreasonable and divisive, we should try to do it respectfully. We can explain why we do it: that we're trying to reduce our us-vs-them animosity. When we're not respectful, we run the risk of adding more fuel to the fire of our divides.