I just wanna know why Billy Bob Thornton isn’t doing the Sling Blade voice in these T-Mobile ads. Huge missed opportunity.

Every year from Sept 16-23. I become the Beatles and get Bi with a little help from my friends.

Man. Ozzy Osbourne missed a huge opportunity by not naming that one song “Loco Locomotive”

I just put everything on Gentle Giant

BREAKING: A fourth plane just hit 4100 Bar 😔

😂

🫶

Time is a flat circle

This guy behind the counter at Rite Aid wanted to buy my Matthew Shepherd guitar pick necklace. The one I caught at his very first concert. I just laughed. This and my BF‘s dog tag from Iraq are 2 things that I will never part ways with, for any price, especially not no damn $8

Epic

Open the straight of her what!?

Unbelievable. NASA makes history with the Artemis II launch, and when CNN interviews the astronauts, the first question is about the latest Kardashian drama. Truly a giant leap for celebrity gossip. We’ve officially achieved escape velocity from journalistic integrity.

🤭

Call me Benjamin, cause I be nettin’ Yahoooooo!

Y’all so woke huh? Then howcome we ain’t got a Slimer in the White House?

I don’t take the Lord‘s name in vain. I take it in vein. It’s like heroin to me. 🙏🏼 💉

I rarely get serious on here. But quick question. Who would be on your Mount Rushmore of First Ladies? Mine is Hillary and Michelle, full body 69, taking up the space of four heads.

Wat tha