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i wear pants every day.

AMERICA!
Joined September 2008
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-Full House -Fuller House -Fullest House -Really Shouldn't Have Eaten That Much House -2 Full 2 House -Full House: Tokyo Drift -Full 7
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Kevin Hart will host the Oscars this year, which makes sense since he was in every movie this year.
didn't see that coming
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iPhone XS is short for iPhone excess price #AppleEvent
ironic Apple is selling a watch considering it will cost you a limb to buy one #AppleEvent
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Kim and Kanye have been together 4 years as of today, which in Kardashian Relationship Years is like 60 years. Congrats!
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then maybe he should consult a physician nitter.gq/Polygon/status/9605746…
Nintendo confirms that Toad is not wearing a hat. That’s his head. polygon.com/2018/2/5/1697458…
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congratulations to Gwenyth Paltrow and her fiancé on their conscious coupling.
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honestly wasn’t planning on seeing Star Wars until I saw this ad for it on my bananas
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John Mayer has been hospitalized for an emergency appendectomy. Doc: I have bad news John: What? Doc: We aren't able to remove your appendix John: Why? Is it cancer? Doc: I'm afraid your body is... John: IS WHAT?! Doc: ...a wonderland. *Doc looks at camera, puts on sunglasses*
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Can't wait to read BuzzFeed's new article: 100 GIFs of Employees We Fired Today Who Are Mad AF
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Blake Shelton is the Sexiest Man Alive? Always a nice feeling to know you and everyone you've ever met is better looking than the Sexiest Man Alive.
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"Is this a Jason Derulo song?" he asked before hearing the first 5 seconds of a Jason Derulo song.
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Twitter is adding more characters and still not making money? Only a matter of time before Hollywood green lights Twitter 2.
Excuse me, ma'am. The nuggets are going to be an extra 5 mins, so if I could have you pull forward a bit. We'll bring them out when ready.
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WEB MD: What's hurts? R.E.M.: Everybody. WEB MD: Might be cancer.
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