TimTom

I love how Apple is personal friends with everyone who uses the Vision Pro lmao

Is it me or is it absolutely insane that a food company can sell me a product and not tell me the ingredients? Coke’s whole thing is their secret formula. That’s weird!!

One winter my sister put a snowball in the freezer to save it until summer. Months later, she got it out and threw it at me while I was playing in the yard. But by then, it had turned into a solid ball of ice. Hard as a rock.

I went to see the eclipse, and during totality it felt like the sun and the moon merged to create a brand new third thing. It’s entirely unlike anything else you’ll ever see in the sky, and it’s only there for a couple fleeting minutes. The pictures really don’t do it justice.

My book shelf is sagging, so I wedged in a load bearing TFIOS lol

gonna get a humidifier and a de-humidifier and make them do battle

Anyone that brags about how smart they are probably isn’t very smart. I would know, I’m extremely intelligent.

I will! 😊

Why don’t movies have laugh tracks?

why is “kicking ass” good, and “sucking ass” bad, when getting your ass kicked sucks, and getting your ass sucked kicks ass?

I just got a dog and I’m already learning so much. For example, did you know that 4am is playtime?

Um ⁦@hankgreen⁩ you’re missing a word

Do we know the name of the sheep whose skin was turned into the Declaration of Independence?

I was about to leave for the weekend to help my sister move house, and on a whim I decided to go back and unplug some things while I was gone, only to find that my apartment was trying to burn itself to the ground. 🔥🔥🔥

you’re telling me a banana nut in this loaf?

me: *lectures my friend about how it’s not healthy to be constantly stimulated by screens* also me: ooh a new NakeyJakey video, i can watch that while I eat lunch!