Created and written by @SamGrittner ***This account is in no way affiliated with the superb show***

Brooklyn. The Village. UWS.
Joined February 2013
TONIGHT ON 'GIRLS': Marnie gets matching tattoos with Charlie by herself; Adam builds a cabin inside his apartment; Jessa heals a scarf
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Tonight on 'GIRLS' retweeted
Hannah writes a NYT-best-selling children’s book about miscarriages; Marnie turns 39 for the third time (turns 42); Shoshanna accidentally stops a mass shooting by fucking an incel; Jessa B E C O M E S A S U N S E T.
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Tonight on 'GIRLS' retweeted
Shoshanna joins the IDF, Hannah joins Hamas, Jessa joins the Houthis, and Marnie joins a new Equinox.
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Hannah takes a bath in her tears; Shoshanna morphs into Hello Kitty; Jessa goes skinny-dipping in the 9/11 memorial; Marnie hires a stalker
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Hannah writes a NYT-best-selling children’s book about miscarriages; Marnie turns 39 for the third time (turns 42); Shoshanna accidentally stops a mass shooting by fucking an incel; Jessa B E C O M E S A S U N S E T.
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Adam gets run over by the same MTA bus in Bushwick for exactly forty-nine minutes.
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Shoshanna joins the IDF, Hannah joins Hamas, Jessa joins the Houthis, and Marnie joins a new Equinox.
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44
3,839
TONIGHT ON GIRLS: Hannah is jealous of a homeless couple; Jessa moves in with a scarecrow; Marnie finds her long lost family living at home
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Jessa's gun addiction becomes problematic; Hannah legally changes her name to "Safe Space"; Marnie gets trapped in a guitar case; Ray clunks
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Hannah tries to donate her pubic hair to a cancer ward; Shoshanna has sex inside a vending machine; Marnie convinces herself she is the OA
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Hannah takes a bath in her tears; Shoshanna morphs into Hello Kitty; Jessa goes skinny-dipping in the 9/11 memorial; Marnie hires a stalker
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Hannah Snapchat's her gynecologist visit; Adam gets booked on an HBO show; Shoshanna drowns in bubble tea; Jessa purifies in the Hudson
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Hannah blocks Anthony Weiner's texts; Jessa scales Trump tower using the elevator; Marnie releases a hit folk-pop single with Bernie Sanders
Ray and Marnie get married and divorced while setting up for a gig; Jessa torches a Sephora; Adam clenches his soul; Desi gets murdered
Hannah gives a silent TEDTalk for 9 hours; Shoshanna makes the cover of FORBES; Ray allows joy to consume him; Fran drills holes in his head
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Hannah handcuffs herself to Hillary Clinton; Jessa seduces Bernie Sanders; Shoshanna finds irrefutable evidence that Ted Cruz is the Zodiac
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Hannah cuts herself breaking the glass ceiling; Marnie enters Chrysalis; Adam makes lightsabers from oak; Jessa hijacks a MegaBus with Kesha
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Hannah has a nervous breakdown deciphering Facebook emojis; Jessa moves to the bottom of a lake; Shoshanna apps; Marnie releases chemtrails
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Hannah OD's on expired cheese; Shoshanna gets arrested selling knock-off Hattori Hanzō swords; Jessa accidentally ends up on display at MoMa
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TONIGHT ON GIRLS: Marnie maps out her dream divorce, Jessa has deviant sex with David Bowie's remains, Hannah invents a vaccine for FOMO
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TONIGHT ON GIRLS: Marnie accidentally stops an ISIS plot; Jessa marries her UBER driver while robo-tripping; Hannah's dad starts dating Adam
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