I’m the homunculus you’re clicking the follow icon on
Planet Earth
Joined May 2020
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To live as a toy is a miracle that only the essence of a poppy flower could conjure #PoppyPlaytime
You ever have one of those days where you’re just too tired to see the nuances and just give in to a surface level reading of it? Not even this specifically but in general. I’ve had days like that, where it’s just too exhausting to feel as hopeful and cheerful because of little things like that. I end up being of those guys who thinks “You’re overthinking it” or “You’re seeing something that isn’t there”. I don’t want to be like that. I just wish it were easier sometimes. I hate that there has to be so much in the way at all. We’ve had easier days as a whole since then but I still have those days sometimes. Depends on the mood, I guess. Like I said a long time ago, there are others who understand it better than me. Any of my own understanding comes long after the fact #LAS #Evangelion
The thread treats Shinji’s core pathology (desperate, self-hating hunger for connection) as if it were a coherent ideology of contempt for women. That framing is wrong. Shinji is a severely traumatized 14-year-old whose dominant experience is that wanting to be loved is itself a transgressive, selfish act. The behaviors the thread cites are symptoms of that, not evidence that he systematically reduces women to objects because they are women.
Shinji’s background is parental abandonment, the loss of his mother, and a father who only acknowledges him when he is useful as a pilot. Affection has always been conditional or absent. The Hedgehog’s Dilemma is the explicit metaphor: he wants closeness but is convinced it will hurt him and that he does not deserve it. This produces a specific distortion. Ordinary human needs (comfort, attention, physical intimacy, the feeling of not being alone) are experienced as something he is not allowed to want. When those needs surface, he experiences them as proof that he is selfish or low. That is why so many of his worst moments are immediately followed by self-loathing rather than entitlement or rationalization.
The hospital scene in The End of Evangelion is the clearest example. It is not presented as an act of domination or sexual entitlement. Shinji is at absolute rock bottom, pleading with an unconscious Asuka to wake up and help him, then masturbates over her exposed body and immediately calls himself “the lowest of the low.” The sequence is ugly and indefensible as an action; it is also the visual expression of a boy who has internalized that his desire for any form of closeness is already a violation. The thread’s reading collapses this into “sexual assault that proves misogyny,” stripping the self-contempt that the scene itself foregrounds.
The same pattern appears in the Instrumentality sequences and the beach strangulation. Shinji’s explicit line is closer to “Nobody wants me, so everybody can just die” than “Women refuse to serve me, so they must be punished.” The rage is misanthropic and despairing, triggered by the failure of the fantasy that closeness can be painless. Asuka’s refusal to function as pure validation or comfort is part of that failure, but so is Shinji’s own inability to accept anyone’s separate existence. The thread isolates the female characters as the special objects of his reduction while downplaying that Shinji’s problem is the inability to accept any other person as separate without experiencing it as abandonment or threat. He idealizes and collapses roles (mother/lover/savior) because that is what desperate, immature attachment looks like when the person has almost no model of secure love. He does not do it because he holds a general view that women exist to serve male needs.
Several moments the thread treats as foundational misogyny are more accurately read as failed or interrupted attempts at the opposite. When Asuka falls asleep in his bed and whispers “mama,” Shinji’s gaze, which had begun to fragment her into body parts, stops; he turns away. He is capable of registering her as a subject with her own interior life, and that recognition disrupts the objectifying impulse. He shows repeated concern for Misato’s and Asuka’s physical safety that is not purely instrumental. These are not the behaviors of someone whose baseline attitude is that women are functions. They are the behaviors of someone whose capacity for sustained recognition of others is fragile and easily overwhelmed by his own terror of rejection.
Compare this with the actual adult misogynists in the series. Gendo treats Rei as a replaceable doll and instrument for his own reunion with Yui; he sexualizes and discards the women around him as tools. Shinji’s trajectory is the opposite of that: he is repeatedly shown the opportunity to become more like Gendo and recoils in horror from it, even when he fails (despite what some twisted doujin that a quack fan showed me one time)
The series is explicit that the fear of becoming the cold, instrumentalizing adult is one of Shinji’s driving anxieties. Treating his adolescent boundary violations and role collapsing as already equivalent to Gendo’s calculated abuse erases the developmental and traumatic difference the show is built on. Asuka’s own behavior is also systematically under-weighted in the thread. She is verbally/physically aggressive toward Shinji for large stretches of the series, mocks his vulnerability, and alternates between seeking his attention and punishing him for offering it. Their dynamic is mutually toxic, both are using the other as a screen for unresolved maternal and self-worth wounds. Framing every instance of Shinji’s frustration or boundary crossing as the unilateral imposition of male entitlement ignores that Asuka is often the more actively hostile party and that Shinji’s passivity is itself a form of emotional withdrawal rather than strategic control.
This person is correct in that Shinji struggles to treat the women around him as fully separate people with their own agency, and that this produces real harm. It is incorrect that this struggle is best understood as misogyny. It is the product of a child who has been taught, by abandonment and by the logic of the Eva project itself, that needing other people is dangerous and that he has no right to the need. Yearning for love is converted into something that feels like a sin precisely because he has no stable sense of self that could hold that yearning without shame or panic. The result is oscillation between passive dependence, intrusive attempts at contact, and self-punishing withdrawal. It’s really not a stable ideology that women exist for his use. The show’s actual thesis is that this conversion of basic need into something shameful is the barrier that has to be dismantled. But this person and many others believe that Shinji must be indicted for possessing the need in the first place. It’s disappointing to put it lightly…
Counting the broad (GVA-style) total: hundreds per year, around 408 in 2025, on a similar trajectory so far in 2026.
Not counting typical gang/dispute/felony-linked cases: on the order of a few dozen public-style incidents per year, not hundreds.
Sounds like Toby is gonna pull the trigger on Gaster for real. And he thinks some people are gonna be disappointed by how that plays out #deltarune
We as an Isekai community overall are inching our way towards a fucking apocalypse in which the world realizes that there are other worlds and that people are being reincarnated there leading to mass suicide rates with the chance of getting a new life in a new world, transported there leading to people from the other side who want them back and are willing to send in their new experimental Magitek F-35’s over what amounts to grand larceny and kidnapping on an unprecedented scale
Of course, the major conclusion would be “real estate” which means the colonizers will come to capitalize on what they can get
Religious organizations around the world will view whatever religions they have as an affront to ours. But since proof of whatever they worship is usually so readily available, there may be people who are more eager to leave behind their prior faith in favor of a more fantastical one that possibly grants mystical powers
Governments will take it as confirmation that not only are we not alone but we are completely outmanned and outgunned and we need to get our own Magitek countermeasures ready to send them up in a mushroom cloud
Imagine how the people would react to those like that slime guy or that undead overlord shitfuck down the street or even our own resident dragon god if they understood what they are and what they could do. When someone comes to light who has the power to wipe out the entire human race, you start asking “how do we kill him?” on the percentile chance that he’ll do just that
Racism would exponentially increase towards people who simply exist in other worlds or even reincarnated humans, something like “redoers” or “save scummers” as well trafficking of races that fulfill typically outlandish fetishes suddenly becomes a lot more feasible for people who are eager to buy. And whatever shut-ins out there who remain in this world and still detached from their humanity will be pretty eager to buy
That and the researchers who will want to perform inhumane experiments and dissections on humans and other races from other worlds with the intention of figuring out what makes them so magically inclined and us not, leading to reverse engineering into a new magical master race with biological enhancements and cures for countless diseases and physical impairments available to anyone with the money for it
The possibilities are endless and catastrophic. Too many “truck-kun” incidents, too many mysterious disappearances without a trace, and everyone in every world could lose everything
The “card house” collapsing isn’t anti-trans “phobia.” It’s the affirmation-only model that treated every case of gender distress as proof the body is wrong. Transitioning is not the answer for the vast majority of people, especially minors and those with autism, trauma, depression, or other comorbidities. Psychological help that explores root causes, treats co-occurring mental health issues, and allows natural resolution is better than irreversible hormones and surgery.
When the evidence is fully faced, the people who need accountability are the ones who shut down therapy, labeled caution as hate, and medicalized distressed kids. Pretending that never happened won’t work either.
Shinji’s near-total lack of self-worth turns even basic attention toward Asuka into emotional labor that feels draining and pointless to him.
Shinji does not experience himself as a person who has inherent value or anything worth offering. His self-image is built almost entirely around external utility (piloting, not disappointing people, avoiding further rejection). When Asuka demands to be seen—whether she’s performing a flashy pool dive and yelling “Watch this, Shinji!” or later mirroring the same need for recognition in the EVA—she is asking him to notice her, react, and affirm that she exists and matters. For someone whose internal model of himself is “I am worthless / unwanted / only tolerable when useful,” that request is exhausting on multiple levels:
1. Giving genuine attention requires believing that your gaze or reaction has weight. Shinji does not believe this. Any praise or focused notice he might give feels fraudulent to him, like he’s play-acting at being a person who can validate someone else. The effort of performing that response (or even just sustaining focus long enough to give a real reaction) costs more energy than it returns.
2. Asuka’s style of seeking attention is rarely soft. It comes packaged with competition, insults, and pressure. Engaging with it means opening himself to the exact feedback loop that already confirms his self-loathing (“of course she’s calling me an idiot / showing off at my expense”). Avoiding or half-assing the attention is his default self-protection; actually paying it forces him to sit inside that discomfort longer.
3. Attention is not neutral for him. It is tightly linked to expectation and potential abandonment. His father’s conditional regard trained him that being noticed usually precedes being used or discarded. Asuka’s constant “look at me / react to me” therefore registers less as connection and more as another demand he will inevitably fail, which is psychologically costly for someone already running on empty.
4. Because he is so absorbed in managing his own emptiness and dread, he has very little surplus bandwidth for other people’s emotional needs. Noticing Asuka properly would require stepping outside his defensive shell long enough to track her performance, her feelings underneath the bravado, and her desire for reciprocity. That is effortful when your baseline is dissociation and low-grade despair.
TL;DR Asuka is asking to be witnessed by someone who does not experience himself as a witness capable of giving anything real. The mismatch makes the simple act of “paying attention” feel like an uphill, high-stakes performance rather than a natural interpersonal exchange. That is why scenes of her seeking his notice so often end with him looking blank, overwhelmed, or minimally responsive—he is not merely uninterested; the internal cost of meeting her need exceeds what his depleted sense of self can sustain
私はずっと心の中に多くのことを抱えてきました。ほとんどは内に秘めています。誰も、ましてや全員が私に同意するとは思っていません。でも、自分の言いたいことは言わなければなりません。その後は、必ず立ち去ります。だから、どうかただ聞いてください。また、ここにある写真はすべて私が描いたものではありません。画面に文字だけが表示されないように追加したものです。もし誰が描いたのか知りたい場合は、他のところで聞いてください。ほとんどの出典は思い出せません。
これは「Everything Gets Worse: A Reckoning with Chainsaw Man パート2」です。
#チェンソーマン
前に進むことの意味（無意味さ）（できないのが怖い）
火曜日の朝、そこにない何かを期待して目を覚ます。これが私があなたに伝えられる最も正直なことです。
何年もの間、火曜日は特別な日でした。新しい章の日。物語が続く日でした。次に何が起こったのかを知った日、少なくとも私を孤独や恐怖から少しだけ解放してくれた世界の中に入ることができた日。そして今、火曜日はただの火曜日であり、その不在は、悲しみが最終的に変わるような清らかな不在ではない。それは衝撃的な種類の不在だ —目の前のものが消える前に本能的にそれを予期するような種類のものです。私は今でも、この急ぎ足で不完全な逆行的な結末が、これらの人々とこの世界に対する最終的な言葉なのかどうか疑問に思っています。私はずっと考えています：もし彼が戻ってきたらどうなるのだろうか？もし何か月か何年か後にパート3があったらどうしますか？それは大丈夫じゃないですか？それは手に取っておく価値のあるものじゃないですか？
実は、私はずっとパート3を望んでいました。希望しないように自分に言い聞かせていました。希望を持たない方が、それを抑えておくのが簡単だったからです。そして今、確実にそれが存在しないことを知った今—少なくとも、存在するものはこれだ—予期していた悲しみに備えるために練習していたことは、実際の悲しみに対しては何の役にも立たなかった。希望を抑えることは私を守らなかった。それは痛みを感じるまでの時間を遅らせただけだった。痛みは待っていた。それに関係なく。レゼ編を見ながら私は泣いた。結末を読んだ後、私は再び、もっと激しく泣いた―なぜなら、私が望んでいたすべて、私が待ち望んでいたすべて、そして私が信じていたこの歩く心が向かっていると信じていたすべては、叶うものではなかったからだ。残酷なのは、このシリーズが私に、他の方法ではできなかっただけのものを与えてくれたことです。私はそれをそれ以上愛さないことはできませんでした。その投資こそがポイントでした。彼は私を壊しました。そしてさらに悪いのは、彼がどうやってそれをしたのか私が知っていることです。
これからどうする？（藤本を無視して飢えさせろ）
私は今後、藤本に気を配らないことを決めました。少なくとも — そうしたいと思っています。私はこれをきっぱりと断ち切り、彼と彼の作品を避け、愛していたものをそのまま手に入れ、その他すべては置いてきたいのです。6月に新しい漫画が出ます。恋愛ものです。そして、私はそれを見るつもりはありません。悪いと確信しているからではなく、もし良かった場合に何を危険にさらすことになるか、そしてこの終わり方をした場合に何を危険にさらすことになるかを今は知っているからです。（これは1か月前に期限だったよ。もしもし？どこにいるの？歩くハートの人って言ったよね？）
もしそれが彼の今まで書いた中で最高の作品だとしても — そしてそうでないとは言えない — 私は特攻隊を待つ間ずっとその時間を過ごすだろう。もう一度は無理だ。こんな結末をもう一度経験する力は私にはない。
私たちみんなでこれを一緒にできたらいいのに。私はMAPPAが起こったことを見て、損切りを決断してほしいと思います。でも彼らはお金が必要です。人々は藤本を愛しているので、彼からもっとを求め続けるでしょうし、観客は戻ってくるでしょう、なぜなら観客はいつも戻ってくるからです。愛着の経済学は、心が傷ついた者には有利ではない。そして私は今でも、戻ってしまうのではないかと心配している。私の中にはまだ手放せないものがある—希望の一片か、愛か、ただの習慣か、私にははっきりとは届かない何かだ。私はチェンソーマンが嫌いだ。私はチェンソーマンが好きだ。代償が何であったか、最後にそれが何になることを選んだかを知りながら、今でもそれを愛してしまう自分が嫌いだ。藤本は私を指先一つで操っていて、そのことについて私が言える最も正直なことは、どうやってそれを止めればいいのかわからないということだ。私は、私たちが見ていたのは、いかなる偽りの二分法にも従わず、自分自身の道を切り開こうとする男の物語だと思っていました。私が思っていた教訓は、普通のこと、つまり温かいものは、たとえ世界がそうではないと主張し続けるとしても、戦う価値があるということでした。でも、多分教訓はこういうことだと思う：そうすると、すべてが悪化する。
それが本当だとは信じたくない。信じなければならない。でも、もしそれが本当なら、あのすべての意味は何だったのか——漫画だけでなく、何年もの年月や、それが助けてくれた不安も含めて、それのおかげで出会った人々、火曜日の朝、そして自分にそうしないように言い聞かせながらも抱き続けた希望。
私の希望は報われなかった。そのことで一人でいるのは嫌だ。
でも、私は一人ではない。もしあなたが私の感じていることを感じるなら、あなたも一人ではない。これは無意味ではなかった。私たちが愛したものは本物だった。彼がそれにしたことは間違っていた。そして、私たちはそれを言うことが許されている。
私はいつまでもチェンソーマンを愛する。でも、私はいつまでも藤本タツキを憎む。今もこれからも心の悪魔として知られる者。人々の心で遊び、それを引き裂く力を持つ者。誰も浮揚できない。彼のことはみんな忘れた方がいいと思う。 くたばれフジモト。くたばれホッパーズ。くたばれTVグロウ。そしてくたばれ『プロジェクト・ヘイル・マリー』（ごめん、ロッキー…）。さて、自分自身のシーシュポス問題に立ち向かいに行く。犬に助けてもらう必要がないことを願う。私たちは群れをかき分けて戦い抜くことができた。私たちは最後の追い込みにいた。チャンスはあった…
