𝖪𝖠𝖱𝖤𝖵，‍ ‍𝖠𝖫͟𝖤͟𝖷.

where’s the beers?

a shrug; sounds pretty fair now. this is his cue to step aside, free hand helping to swing the door open for her. he loves that face, agitated or not. “ it was you?! babe, you should’ve said. i would’ve let you in sooner. ”

a raise of octave, “ LeT mE iN! ” okay, now he’s chuckling while simultaneously tossing another chip into his mouth. hm.. “ can i come with you? ”

suppressing a chuckle —— it’d only piss her off, as fun as that usually is. he’s not trying to die just yet. “ i’m telling him you said that. ”

“ wrong! ” he’s attempting to mask the grin he feels tugging at his lips, a large foot planted against the door to block her entry. “ you have four lives remaining. ”

he’s not expecting anyone, is he? a brow is raising, one hand loaded with a bag of chips as he opens the door by an inch, crunching obnoxiously. oh, he’s gonna have fun with this. “ what’s the secret password? ”

maybe even the bad, salty kind.

i’m willing to trade you for a good bag of chips.

hey. i’m selling something you might be interested in, @neurosbest.

declined.

so many boobs to pick from ..

hell freakin’ yeah.

you know this means i can get a new wife too, right?

you stink.

one ( 1 ) wife for sale. will consider an exchange.

DUDE. do i at least get a pen?!

WE’RE ALREADY MARRIED?

yeah. what’s with the attitude?