Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed) header
Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed) profile picture

Lizzie

@biscuit_ersed

hopelessly devoted to crisps. greyhound butler.

 Glasgow, Scotland
Joined April 2009
  • Tweets145K
  • Following1.3K
  • Followers2K
13.7KMedia
Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)Photo by Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)
Traced a branch of my dad’s family to Stirling in the 1780s. They were commercial artists and portrait painters. I hope they’re proud that I’ve inherited their artistic skills
Image from Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)
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Oh I’m not well. Fever and shivering and joint pains and coughing and melty brain.
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The crowman needs to do something about Worzel's remembering head (autocorrect now corrected to what i typed)
Image from Scott Wortley (@Scott_Wortley)
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Happy boy
Image from Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)
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Is Farmfoods better
jabrielle. (@gsbabyyyy) profile picturejabrielle.@gsbabyyyyNov 7
This is a public service announcement. If you don’t have money do not visit Iceland.
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Lizzie retweeted
MADNICE (@djmadnice) profile picture
MADNICE@djmadniceNov 7
Probably the wrong person to put in charge of your military IT security
Image from MADNICE (@djmadnice)
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Sick of these fucking fireworks, fuck off
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Lizzie retweeted
ethyl ꕤ (@luvmoonv) profile picture
ethyl ꕤ
@luvmoonvNov 7
me: "mom i want SKIMS andvent calendar!!" mom: "no, we have it at home" the skims calendar at home:
Image from ethyl ꕤ (@luvmoonv)
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Would be hilarious if it was Andrew Tate. Cutting about Dubai dressed up as his auntie Brenda, dobbing in all the other paedos for a chance at a Mars Bar every other Tuesday.
UK Dispatch (@UKDispatch_) profile pictureUK Dispatch
@UKDispatch_Nov 6
BREAKING 🚨: MI5 have confirmed that a high profile “RIGHT WING” activist has been working for them under cover and they have even lied to multiple courts to try cover it up. The high court ruled that it wouldn’t be in the public interest to bring contempt proceedings against MI5. This individual was known to the MI5 as “Agent X”
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I fuckin love science
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I am so glad I took today off work. Fireworks yesterday from around 2pm to after 1am. Poor dog’s exhausted.
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Oh no I’ve annoyed some Russians
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I have another one. So after my dad died, my mum’s sister came over from Detroit for the funeral. So one night my mobile rang and it was my dad. I was confused but also did the doctors make a mistake? Then I was seriously freaked out. 1/2
Image from Lizzie (@biscuit_ersed)
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Obviously I didn’t answer it because GHOSTS PHONING FROM HEAVEN Anyway about ten minutes later my mum phoned and said she’d loaned my auntie my dad’s phone and forgot to tell me.
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Noisy playlist just transported me back to many a sticky-floored nightclub. Dog remains unimpressed.
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The Booze Agents
Politics For You (@PoliticoForYou) profile picturePolitics For You
@PoliticoForYouNov 4
BREAKING 🚨🚨🚨 Former UK PM Liz Truss and failed Senate candidate Haley Stevens are reportedly in talks to start a podcast together though it’s believed they haven’t settled on a name.
Image from Politics For You (@PoliticoForYou)
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Some of us even live in Not America. Mind blowing, I know.
alex bronzini-vender (@alexbronzini) profile picturealex bronzini-vender
@alexbronziniNov 5
Okay I have to ask. Do white people actually talk like the first guy in the Deep South?
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WAHHHH THE SCAMPS AND SCALLYWAGS HAVE GUSHED FORTH A KIND OF VILLAINOUS CONCOCTION OF SUCROSE AND BOILING WATER IN MY PEEPERS WHICH IS IN A VERY REAL SENSE DISSOLVING MY FACE
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Rapey cunty wunty
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All hail the mighty Pogues. Noisy as fuck. I have a very understanding neighbour.
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#russellbrand
Image from BOO!rassic Snark (@underhandrea)
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