community script

Six seasons and a movie.

where is this damn movie

Guys, I've been thinking about that night over and over. One thing has become clear. This is the darkest, most terrible timeline.

It's December 10th!

Hey, instead of this constable, what about a blonde with long legs and a tennis racket?

Woah, woah, woah. Are you saying 600,000 people read what I say on Twitter? We gotta cash in on that! How 'bout oldwhitemansays... The TV show?

You guys, I found it. The ultimate blow-off class. Professor Whitman, he thinks he's in Dead Poets Society. There's no tests, there's no work, it's just day seizing.

♪ Somewhere… out there… ♪ Troy, sing. The assignment is to train a rat to respond to a specific song.

Because all of the filmmakers are Jesus, and all their cameras are God, and the movie is called ABED. All caps. Filmmaking beyond film. A meta film. My masterpiece.

It's not a request. I'm giving you an all tomato. Meaning you give me the whole tomato or else.

♪ A-B-E-D! Connoisseur of Christmas! On the spectrum? None of your business! ♪

Abed has a new favorite TV show, Jeff. It's called Inspector Spacetime.

Mr. Guzman, Luis, thank you. And can I just say, I loved you in… Innnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn… IMDb.

If I wasn't actively repressing my bi-curiosity, I would kiss you full on your beautiful mouth.

I see a man using a social disorder as a procedural device. Wait, wait, wait, I see another man. Mildly autistic super detectives everywhere. Basic cable, broadcast networks. Pain. Painful writing. It hurts.

From now on, April Fools' Day is banished, okay? At Greendale, April 1st is officially March 32nd forever.

[Troy and Abed kiss.]