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Fresh Johnson

@freshjohnson

Part mermaid, part unprofessional dancer. I talk on the radio and I know how to embalm people.

 New Orleans
freshjohnson.com
Joined March 2009
  • Tweets67.2K
  • Following666
  • Followers2.2K
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Photo by Fresh Johnson (@freshjohnson)Photo by Fresh Johnson (@freshjohnson)Photo by Fresh Johnson (@freshjohnson)Photo by Fresh Johnson (@freshjohnson)Photo by Fresh Johnson (@freshjohnson)Photo by Fresh Johnson (@freshjohnson)Photo by Fresh Johnson (@freshjohnson)
I hate how dusty our #SkyClub is in MSY. My fork is icky and my flute has lip prints on it. The staff is always impeccably kind, but there's def a quality control issue here @Delta ...this is how people stay sick
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Have we discussed, as a family, how terrible the parents from Home Alone were?
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I just witnessed a child have a meltdown in the pumpkin patch because he wanted to go to the pumpkin patch. That he was standing in. LMAO Y’all parent every day? Oh my God. 😂
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A lot of y’all would be easier to digest if y’all just admitted that y’all mamas don’t like y’all, and that’s why you hate black women. Also note that Nia wouldn’t smash y’all with a borrowed puss. There, I said it. ::wipes forehead::
Real shit lol RT @SasTheAss: when you actually date someone who likes you, these dating topics on the TL start to look bizzare 😭
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I’m going to see Ginuwine when he comes to New Orleans simply because of his funny moves lol
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And that’s no shade to ppl up in age turning new leaves, because with this most recent degree, I’m doing just that. I’m talking about niggas out here looking exponentially stupid on Beyoncé’s internet for clicks, likes and follows.
Journalism is one thing. Cyber-bullying is another. At some point, you gotta question one’s seemingly unhealthy obsession with someone they hate. Furthermore, if you’re a journalist, why do I know your disdain for a figure?
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Y’all. I’m way too shallow for monkey pox. Vax me please.
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And also laughing that y’all still got these daily horoscopes on auto
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After what seems like a decade hiatus of consistent tweeting, I’m back. I love that @JayBilas is still dropping bars every single morning.
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Dear White Moms, The noise is coming from inside the house.
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Termites really just go inside like their mama called them. That’s wild. #NewOrleans
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Mercury tryna get a head start on microblading, huh?
At this point, I don’t even want my 40 acres and a Mule anymore. We just need to start from scratch…no stealing this time tho.
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Just posted a photo @ Cabo San Lucas, Baja California Sur instagram.com/p/CTSiCjalUnP/…
Just posted a photo @ Cabo San Lucas, Baja California Sur instagram.com/p/CTSh14sF8km/…
How can I pour you a drink if my bottle empty? Normalize #MentalHealthDays. @ Out of Office instagram.com/p/CN5sPUWFNVh/…
Fresh Johnson (@freshjohnson) • Instagram photo

Fresh Johnson (@freshjohnson) • Instagram photo

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