Two weeks till my birthday 😬😬

If i had a gf i wouldn't know what to do i'd just be like "hello..." 😐

Heyy does anyone want to love me unconditionally?

Another Monday morning without you next to me

When in doubt i look to the moon

My air fryer just said its first word

I'm like Benjamin Button but the opposite

An extra hour to yearn

I must've lost some weight, my cargos keep falling down

Daddy has a boo-boo on his finger, kitten

Do you ever feel like sometimes

Time to shower and trim my disgusting beard brb

Who up catching their worm

Not right now babe, the high council is awaiting my presence

If there are zero believers in Bigfoot, it's because i died!

How to say gm without sounding too horny

Why aren't you here rotting next to me? Another one of life's mysteries

Don't give me multiple tasks at once, i will forget to do them because I'm easily distracted

First date idea: we hatch our escape plan