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Comedian, Software Engineer, Los Angeles

Los Angeles, CA
Joined December 2009
Photo by kat yeary (@katyeary)Photo by kat yeary (@katyeary)Photo by kat yeary (@katyeary)Photo by kat yeary (@katyeary)Photo by kat yeary (@katyeary)Photo by kat yeary (@katyeary)Photo by kat yeary (@katyeary)Photo by kat yeary (@katyeary)Photo by kat yeary (@katyeary)
If your tattoos aren’t stupid you’re a fucking nerd
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At a USC hospital visiting a friend. They play a TED talk about penis implants on a constant loop in the lobby. We’re on day 3. Don’t say there’s nothing to love about American healthcare.
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They blow up the drawings of the micropenis really really big just in case
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What do people "do"? Did we used to do something?
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Imagine both worlds where the dip stock skyrockets and Lipton’s French onion mix is $400
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Coding has absolutely increased my cheeto intake, luckily mtn dew is still a hard no
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What?! 😂
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Remember when one of the most offensive things a person could do was rollerblading?
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I dream of a future where no jobs require skills or even human beings at all and we get 5000 a month to go to the beach
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As an 18 year-old I went to work every day at 5 AM to wash dishes next to a known sex offender. Just the two of us. This isn’t about the minimum wage I was just remembering his sick prison tattoos
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There were literally people who love essential oils so much they joined QAnon - why do these people continue to diss California?!
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You know I think it’s tine to acknowledge that the power of positive thinking worked really, really well
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I don’t get why we don’t just brainwash them it’s obviously very easy
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I thank God my uncles didn’t live to see those animals try to overthrow the government because they 100% would have joined
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I was in a cult for 6 months once and let me tell you in this case victim-blaming is fun AND effective
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Let us never forget that Trump and Giuliani were the greatest comedy duo to ever try to overthrow the government
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I’m kinda scared, but the way they‘re face planting along the way...really brings a smile to my heart
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The greatest tragic irony for me is the guy who has a boner for guns dies because he’s scared of a flash bang
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Today is the day the slim jim stepped into us
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19 days since I found pie crust in my nose
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