daniel (@lightfallsup) profile picture

daniel

@lightfallsup

I read books, make jokes, listen to music and generally look for ways to avoid writing.

favstar.fm/users/lightfallsup
Joined July 2010
  • Tweets4.7K
  • Following1.1K
  • Followers6.3K
It's all fun and games until a metal flask falls out of your car in the church parking lot.
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It's weird when cars don't have Uber drivers in them.
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I'm not saying women are smarter than men, but its kinda ironic that there's so few known women serial killers and so many unsolved murders.
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It's like my girlfriend doesn't appreciate how much time and effort I put into complaining about her on the internet.
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Replying to @lightfallsup
@lightfallsup, 100 Favs! Your tweet has been favorited by 100 people. favstar.fm/t/206777793957203…
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Ever notice how white women over 40 can’t dance without clapping?
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Elton John's other song "Leave me alone, enormous dancer" didn't do as well.
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Thousands of years oppressing people and all of a sudden I'm the bad guy.
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I put the "awkward silence" in party.
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Hate to be the one to break it to you Canada, but that's ham.
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Replying to @lightfallsup
@lightfallsup, 50 Favs! Your tweet has been favorited by 50 people. favstar.fm/t/202530077467086…
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Replying to @lightfallsup
@lightfallsup, 50 Favs! Your tweet has been favorited by 50 people. favstar.fm/t/205358442892898…
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Replying to @lightfallsup
@lightfallsup, 50 Favs! Your tweet has been favorited by 50 people. favstar.fm/t/203877643177828…
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Replying to @lightfallsup
@lightfallsup, 100 Favs! Your tweet has been favorited by 100 people. favstar.fm/t/201029452350758…
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I like to think my unfollowers were taken to a farm, where they run free and chase rabbits and get run over by tractors.
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Replying to @lightfallsup
@lightfallsup, 50 Favs! Your tweet has been favorited by 50 people. favstar.fm/t/208608838369292…
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Retweeting is contagious. Some of you need to give it a fucking go once in awhile.
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Technically, a bus driver is anyone who drives a bus, Officer.
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Thanks for telling me I'm not funny, dude with 52 followers. You must be part of a super secret circle of hilarity.
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Trying to order a Subway sandwich using only lyrics from Journey songs is super complicated.
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