CookieMan

Password looks at itself in the mirror* "Don't listen to Google. You are a strong, confident password." #itcouldhappen

You go, my guy…😂🤷🏼‍♂️

Anyone else have weeks like this? Moooooonday Tuuuuuuesday Wedddnesday Thuuuuursday FridaySaturdaySunday

Guess who we are?

Here we go…

You know the difference between a hippo and a zippo? One is heavy and the other is a little lighter...

Interviewer: If we hire you, where do you hope to be in five years? Me: On paid administrative leave.

I was at Lowes trying to get some paint and the clerk told me the color I wanted didn’t exist. I guess it was just a pigment of my imagination

Hello, X friends! Would you consider praying for us as we make plans to travel to Uganda, Africa! Donate to Paul Cook for Uganda A Adult 2027 - The Church Of Eleven22 (powered by ServiceReef) coe22.servicereef.com/events…

My weight loss coach suggested I keep a food journal to help me understand my daily caloric intake versus output each day. Breakfast: 300 calories Lunch: 450 calories Dinner: 600 calories Evening Snack: 2400 calories Thanks to AI, this plan is totally working for me.

I bet if it was the other way around, a cat wouldn't take in 23 old women. #truth #catlady

Can you imagine how big the jockstrap must be for the World Cup? #worldcup #soccer

Yesterday, I woke up from a deep sleep in a panic thinking I was late for work. Thankfully, I was already at work

Sadly, it was also D-day for a number of kids on their last day of school. #reportcard

If you know, you know

Vive la France

Fun fact of the day: While Alan Turing was cracking codes in WW2, his sister, Kay, was providing drinks, snacks and sandwiches for him and his colleagues. She went on to create a whole new concept of providing food to large groups.

True story from the radiology department: Patient: "I don't mean to sound racist but why is my baby black?" Tech: "Uh, this is just an ultrasound" *silence

You healthnuts can say what you want but high cholesterol foods will always have a special place in my heart