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Samazing (@samjamz33) profile picture

Samazing

@samjamz33

At the touch of love everyone becomes a poet. ~Plato

 United States
Joined November 2012
  • Tweets6.6K
  • Following300
  • Followers137
390Media
Photo by Samazing (@samjamz33)Photo by Samazing (@samjamz33)Photo by Samazing (@samjamz33)Photo by Samazing (@samjamz33)Photo by Samazing (@samjamz33)Photo by Samazing (@samjamz33)Photo by Samazing (@samjamz33)Photo by Samazing (@samjamz33)Photo by Samazing (@samjamz33)
"It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are." ~e.e. cummings
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[first day as safari guide] me: ah yes on your left you can see some uh [forgot my glasses] guests: [looking at flamingos] me: i'm gonna say cotton candy
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I told two food workers today that they were the shit. Take the time to appreciate good service. 🙌
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friend: "ok, when does a joke become a 'dad joke'?" me, with no hesitation: "when it becomes apparent"
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When you take one (1) good selfie. #TheOffice
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I love catching the moment the streetlights turn on
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If I ever start wearing old lady perfume, tell me
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Maybe gluten doesn’t like us either
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Samazing retweeted
Josh (@iwearaonesie) profile picture
Josh@iwearaonesie21 Aug 2018
boss: Why are you late? [flashback to me trying to find a show the dog would like] me: Traffic
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Bold move.
Jeff Russell (@rock_hawk) profile pictureJeff Russell@rock_hawk21 Aug 2018
When Michael Scott photoshops himself with Carol for his Twitter profile. @SteveCarell @theofficenbc
Image from Jeff Russell (@rock_hawk)
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Me during sex: hurt me Her: you will never achieve a perfect mixdown Me: what Her: there will always be a greater and unreachable tier of quality - your search for perfection will ultimately lead to your demise as you prioritize technical facets over the music itself Me: stop
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antoni from queer eye prolly opening a fresh container of hummus rn
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Medicare for all: “Too expensive!” Infrastructure: “Too expensive!” Good schools: “Too expensive!” Job training: “Too expensive!” A living wage: “Too expensive!” A whole new branch of the military but set in space, where no one lives: “Oh yeah, we can afford that!”
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