Simon

I'm playing @acerider_game for iOS. Join me! aceridergame.com/download

My girlfriend asked me why I was blowdrying my penis. Apparently "Heating up your dinner" wasn't a good answer.

You can't spell healthcare without THC.

Fred is a fag, ive got socks that are older and smarter than him #KAPlife

Here i sit on the shitter, giving birth to another kiewiter #topKAPbathroomgrafs

#undercover #sneaky

If I was a potato, I'd be a #baked potato.

4:20 toke o clock, followed by pip oclock if my plan works out

4am?? No problem. All day, everyday is the #BestTimeToSmokeWeed

There was a 4 car accident in Mexico yesterday, 87 died.

What do ducks smoke? Quack

If she smokes weed, she's probably a keeper.

I like my #Weed like I like my popcorn and watermelon... With no seeds.

#BackWhenIWasAKid everything you did was fun. Imagine if you were stoned.

#ThatMiniHeartAttackWhen you think you lost your #weed, but remember you just hid it in a completely random spot.

As a kid I was forced to eat my greens, now I voluntarily smoke them. #cantwaittogobackhome #chocolopeAAAwaitinginmasonjar

Calling your girlfriend beautiful cause your dick isn't gonna suck itself. #Truth