I'm sarcastic and Northern.

Joined July 2013
Chloe 18... Mum, did lads used to send you dick pics when you were a teenager? Me... Oh yeah, loads. They used to take a pic of their bits, nip down Boots, wait a week for it to be developed, catch the bus back to pick it up then fetch it to the Youthy on a Friday to show me.
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Merry Xmas you filthy animals. Time for some gin and Home Alone. Gone are the days of wrapping at midnight and prodding a turkey every 5 minutes to see if it has defrosted 👍
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Making chocolate bark like Mary fucking Berry.
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2025 Round up … lost 3 and a half stone Gained a promotion House remains full of adult children and dogs 3 holidays taken and two booked. Shower tray remains broken because Jet 2 keep sending me more offers than B&Q.
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Right go on, piss off and have a bloody amazing Christmas. PS… the alcohol photo is reused from last year because this years is all still in bags. The double fridge died 4 years ago. Yes there is a large Lurpak. The turkey is currently under construction. #TwinksXmasFridge
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Upsated alcohol photo now I have finished going to 15 supermarkets and farm shops.
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Stay tuned for #XmasFridge this time next week… You didn’t think I would let you down, did you?
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We fly on sunday morning. Ellie has not packed. She has however chosen to leave an opened suitcase on the landing for the last three days and throw things in its general direction every now and again.
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I have clothes all over the bed and the landing and my motivation has suddenly disappeared and I am sitting in the middle of it wearing some sunglasses a bikini top and pyjama bottoms.
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Ellies case has made progress…
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While I have been away I have slid in to my old lady core and spend literal hours gardening. Wandering around just checking plants. At least they can’t ask me for money or a lift, every cloud and that
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Sorts me right out does this. I am still crackers, but my brain now only has 7 tabs open rather than 15 👌
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When we go on holiday, we are taking Ellie, her best mate and also her parents who are our friends. Ellie and her mate are almost 18. My anxiety is already making my eye twitch.
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Running a Vinted empire is hard work, isn’t it? Been a proper slog this week earning *checks notes* … £23
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Anyway, how is everyone? I suspect there are about 3 of you left in this horrific bin fire
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Nothing to report here, twins just finished year 1 midwifery, Ellie works 2 jobs and is starting health and social care, Son still doing something to do with chemicals that I don’t really understand but just nod and smile, we are off on holiday next week, and I am still a knob
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My Mounjaro delivery was three days late, I have just opened that box like a smack head who has sold a PS4 and secured a deal.
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Is there anyone left in here? I forgot to log on since Christmas.
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One hour to put together bag one of Lego Hogwarts Castle. I shall post the completed project from my Nursing home
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It’s coming together…
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Main course ..
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Dessert table …
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