sammy coocooroo

dreams come true

shoutout to the 50+ year old man i just saw driving his range rover in a bald cap and full head/face makeup as The Lorax

american psycho remake requires robert pattinson or dont make it

the purdue QB used to make fun of me in highschool so tonight imma scream at him on TV Boilermakers +1800 BABY

betting apps make you sign 3 sets of paperwork confirm an SMS code and do a citizenship test if u want to withdraw money

if u didnt want to talk about politics u shouldn’t have come over to watch football

got a little too into football just now until i remembered thats what The System wants

#correct i am a princess get blocked

personally dont want my president to think of a single human being as anything less than 💯💯💯

now that im 21 i sure would HATE if a bunch of sportsbooks started giving me targeted ads for free play deals

when u find a thrift spot she would’ve loved

i’m up on time today. not for the stock market or a job necessarily but i did want to make some tiktoks and tweet a bunch

I’d like to address the elephant in the room. im paying for twitter with the hopes that now he’ll let me come within striking distance should i ever meet him in person.

Boss said I was late again for work so i told him ‘time hath forsaken its import ever since the grievous day i lost her

its a shame i’ll never get to be a lesbian. i’ll just get to be miserable forever instead

“crash-out” and “aura” have hit their expiration dates can we come up with new ones for those maybe

#NewProfilePic #Vacation

buzz for new NCAA college football video game died down so the EA overlords called in their #Sketch exposition to stimulate the content creator community for when he makes vid on it