opeaceooo

Two weeks ago, I went for a run along Airport Road, a popular route where hundreds of people walk and run. Two men were staring in my direction and catcalling me. Mind you, I had my headphones on. One of them eventually walked up to me, lifted my headphones off my ears without my consent and said, “Smile, you be fine girl.” They did this while other men stood watching and cars drove past, navigating the bumps on the road. I felt so violated and humiliated. I turned around, walked back and emptied the contents of my water bottle on him. That was when things escalated. Other men began charging towards me. Thankfully, a few people who had witnessed what happened spoke up and explained the situation to a man who stepped in to mediate. He told the men plainly that the two of them were wrong and that the CCTV cameras had captured the incident. The man who harassed me kept insisting that what he did wasn’t harassment. Another tried to justify his behaviour by saying he was simply appreciating what God had created. The mediator had to explain something that should be basic knowledge saying, “You do not know this woman, you have no right to touch her, pull her headphones off or demand that she smile for you” Imagine having to explain something as fundamental as bodily autonomy to grown men. They eventually asked whether pouring water on him was justified, and the mediator told them that his actions had invited that reaction. Meanwhile, because I had recorded videos earlier, they became even more upset about the footage. They started pleading with the mediator to ask me to delete the videos. It is exhausting being a woman. Exhausting to simply exist in public without being subjected to unsolicited attention, entitlement, harassment and the expectation that you must always be pleasant and accommodating. You cannot simply run, walk, mind your business or exist in your own body without someone feeling entitled to your attention, your smile or your compliance. It’s almost as though being born a woman means being assigned a lifelong responsibility to anticipate, manage and protect yourself from other people’s entitlement.