@zzdoublezz

~ beloved comedian ~ check out my new podcast JUDGMENT DAY

 Brooklyn, NY
linktr.ee/zzdoublezz
Joined February 2009
  • Tweets29K
  • Following1.9K
  • Followers18.9K
4.7KMedia
going through old hinge messages and god this one hurt
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Wtf is going on at Staples armadillogossip.substack.com…
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a monument of love
Kevin Esherick 👖
@kev_eshOct 25
Elizabeth Holmes lookalike competition at Washington Square Park
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I met someone named Pearl and made the literary reference (The Scarlet Letter) not the crass one (cumming on someone's neck) and that is #growth
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Zach Zimmerman retweeted
Benny Feldman@FeldfrogOct 24
Some jokes from my special 🐠
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I am the backbone of my community (pay for the paramount+ account)
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Did you know you’re more likely to die on your birthday? Happy birthday!
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I also pay a little more attention when someone sets themselves on fire
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I hate gay Halloween what do you mean you’re gay
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wow I stole my own tweet
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Zach Zimmerman retweeted
Zach Zimmerman@zzdoublezzSep 23
I hate gay Halloween what do you mean you’re gay
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I don’t slide into DMs, I clunkily arrive in private messages
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when I slid into a guy’s DMs with a fire emoji and he replied “what does the fire emoji mean”
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I just wanna shout out “g” and “h” for the work they do in words like “night” and “sigh” and “weight” — go on, girl give us nothing
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got so high last night I yelled “SHOW ME THE THREE DIMENSIONS” to a friend “POINT TO THEM” I further pressed
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this bitch again
Pop Crave
@PopCraveOct 24
Mercury is in retrograde again until November 13.
Readers added context they thought people might want to know
That is Mars. en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mars
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Zach Zimmerman retweeted
lewis@Lewiswbt1Oct 24
I've always vaguely seen "April May June July" as a kind of "7 ate 9" thing, although everything's a bit more up in the air since I don't know what "to June" means and it's not certain it'll happen anyway
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I have a hot take that would divide the nation — saving until after the midterms
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brevity soul wit
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I wish I could say “I’m not friendly” to be left alone like we do with dogs
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“I got uninvited to the Grindr pleasure ball because I outed the crumbl cookie CEO (allegedly)” is a The Other Two plotline
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being concise is so important. it’s really one of the most essential, valuable traits in this time in this country among other things
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