Colton Heuple

Caps are on pace for an 84-0 season. #allcaps

The NHL needs games on Friday nights, no college football or NFL on. Seems like a huge opportunity missed for little competition with airtime and after a long work week I just wanna crack a few sodas and watch puck

Brb ubering to Naperville to kick my co-workers fucking ass

Chicks that hangout at navy pier look like mike wazowski

How do all Arab people get Lincolns for Uber

Please dont put “Can you help ASAP” at the bottom of your email after taking 8 months to respond back.

@McDonalds why can’t I checkout of my cart? I just wanna eat. But ai gotta check more boxes….. i just didn’t order bc idk how to

The fact that Walmart doesn’t accept tap to pay is ludicrous

@MikeGrinnell_ im listening to today chiclets and youre just muffled talking over 1:15.00 mark??? What we doing?

The New York Football Giants jerseys (from New Jersey) look like a Pokémon ball

I cant wait for the commies to suck this year #Skins

RIP to Omegle, end of an era

Boy dinner

Gambling losses should be a tax write off.

Rise up Redhawks

We need to normalize the Irish exit

Can we cancel RG3? Buddy gets taken 2nd overall and thinks he’s Mr big brain football wizard.

The fish tank at Wills is such a nice touch for the place.

@rustyspoon68 Sup

Kirkwood might have the cleanest Porta Johns in the US