Capt Scrod

From: The Civil War, the Natalie Harp letters... My Dearest Donald, I write these lines with a heavy heart, for I must beg your pardon for the troubles of last evening. I had believed myself the sole soul left behind when the hour grew late, wholly unaware that Margo’s carriage had likewise been halted upon the road and turned back toward the landing field. Finding myself alone in the wagon without the gates of the Custom House, and lacking my papers of passage, a sudden panic seized me. In my distress I ought to have summoned the Secret Service rather than impose upon your own precious time. I am likewise most sorry if my walking of the course in Scotland brought any shadow of embarrassment upon you. On the first day I was informed that no carts were to be had, and as others went afoot, so did I. Upon the second day, one of the principal gentlemen in charge, whose name escapes me now, bade me continue on foot and to counsel any other young ladies who might venture forth to do the same, that the course might be spared further use of carts. If in any other particular I have caused you vexation, I pray you forgive me. I am told that certain persons complain I have not answered their messages; yet there have been difficulties with the international wires (and John himself suffered technical trials upon the flying machine, for which reason he sought my aid). It is my dearest wish that all may remain right and true between us! I confess I have been much distracted this past week, neglecting even to take my meals through the long days, and finding rest but a scant two hours at a stretch. I have not been myself, dwelling continually upon the past and the bitter sorrow of my father’s departure from this life. Remarks that once would have passed me by now wound me deeply, not from any care for the world’s opinion, but because I fear I sink in your esteem and good regard. That is the dread which haunts me, for I would bring you naught but joy. Yet even amid these troubles, I cannot deny the heat that rises in my loins whenever my thoughts turn to you, nor the longing that stirs at the mere recollection of the man-mushroom betwixt your legs. I am sorry I have lost my proper focus. You are all that matters to me in this world. I would not for any treasure let you down. Thank you for standing as my Guardian and Protector in this life—just as I had hoped to express upon the card you saw me purchase at the merchant’s counter, when once again you performed a kindness you need not have done, and bestowed upon me the keepsakes of this journey of a lifetime, this coming of age. I shall return to you a better soul. The carriages are even now departing, and I must close these lines. I remain, with all my heart, Your most devoted, Natalie