Carpe (@CarpesReturn) header
Carpe (@CarpesReturn) profile picture

The world’s foremost expert in humility.

Joined October 2023
Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)Photo by Carpe (@CarpesReturn)
Government and women. Every problem in your life can be traced back to one of those. Often, it’s women in government.
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New team, same Giannis 🔥 #killme
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WTF?
You seem to be doomscrolling a lot for someone who has 20+ unread books.
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My daughter recommend American Horror Story to us. By season 3 I was ready to end it. My life. Not the show. Does this get better or does it just keep being girlboss vampire porn?
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Carpe retweeted
that “get a load of this guy” hand gesture is easily one of the top 2 hand gestures of all time
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is this where i get to call him a nigger?
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Motherfucker, that's called LinkedIn
Debería de haber una app como tinder pero Nadamas para tener sexo
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Erections have consequences.
Replying to @CarpesReturn
Elections have consequences.
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‘…screen for men who think we are great…’
I am never listening to a single man accuse women of "hypergamy" again. There is no "hypergamy." Women, including me, are doing our best to screen for men who think we are great. This is just the same Sunday after he was here. Are all of his nice texts lies to someone he thought was below him? Men who think they are too good for us should not be texting us like this. PERIOD!! And I think in general, they don't. I think men mostly mean it and are not just lying and being players. Does this look like a player? Was I getting played in a Chad harem? No I don't actually think so. I think I got paranoid because of all these "hypergamy"'accusations. The inverse is hypogamy. Men are implicitly accusing other men of being hypogamous.
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I am never listening to a single man accuse women of "hypergamy" again. There is no "hypergamy." Women, including me, are doing our best to screen for men who think we are great. This is just the same Sunday after he was here. Are all of his nice texts lies to someone he thought was below him? Men who think they are too good for us should not be texting us like this. PERIOD!! And I think in general, they don't. I think men mostly mean it and are not just lying and being players. Does this look like a player? Was I getting played in a Chad harem? No I don't actually think so. I think I got paranoid because of all these "hypergamy"'accusations. The inverse is hypogamy. Men are implicitly accusing other men of being hypogamous.
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Carpe retweeted
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Carpe retweeted
"what if ai gets too good" i dont know . Who cares. What if bras and panties get too erotic
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I'm organising a charity event for people who never have orgasms. Please let me know if you can't come.
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Воскресный день А вы шо делаете?😆😆😆😆😆
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mom, dad, this is my replyguy
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Carpe retweeted
[seductively takes off glasses] wow you're fucking blurry
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Carpe retweeted
if weed can damage your short term memory imagine what weed can fucking do
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Me, flirting
Replying to @Tapas1776
Not exactly a stubby. It’s still about 6” long.
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“your tweets suck and no one loves you”
your tweets suck and no one loves you
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Do you think Limu Emu and Liberty Biberty have ever explored each others bodies
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