Not JCred (@JCred) header
Not JCred (@JCred) profile picture

I keep it serious.

Denver, CO
Joined April 2008
Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)Photo by Not JCred (@JCred)
White smoke over Tel Aviv, Ethan Klein has chosen a new mistress
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Not JCred retweeted
As a proud immigration enforcement hardliner it has been rather lonely around these parts seeing former self-identified hardliners get soft when it’s their friend facing removal. Watching them obfuscate and outright lie as they wrap themselves in faith is a gross spectacle.
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Not JCred retweeted
😂😂😂😂😂 YES
44% of our @starlink installations are complete. (That’s 44 out of every 100 if you're reading this, Dan Orlovsky.)
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Oh. Well, that ruined this show for me.
17-year-old former Home Improvement child actor Taran Noah Smith and his wife, 32-year-old Heidi van Pelt, start a vegan food company. The union is controversial due to the couple’s 15-year age gap and the fact that they have been intimate since Smith was 14.
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lol I didn't even notice the guy with the gun behind me until he car jacked me. It's okay, though. He probably needed a car more than me. I don't judge.
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Not deleting this app until I’m 190 years old
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At what?
Replying to @ShannonSharpe
Dak better than Elway
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Sydney Sweeney reveals in an interview that she doesn’t care about the PHP vulnerability because she moved everything to Rust in 2024. “They said the rewrite would take six months. We’re on month 30. We haven’t shipped a feature since, but I’m having a very normal Wednesday.”
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The black rifle coffee alpha male takes a sip from his thermos and looks out from the bunker to the battlefield, it’s hell out there. “Perfect” He thinks He adjusts the sights on his custom-built 16-inch 6mm ARC AR-15 with a Proof Research carbon-fiber barrel, JP Enterprises silent captured spring system, and a Geissele Super Dynamic Enhanced two-stage trigger. He picked it because the trigger felt smooth against his $350 carbon fiber combat gloves, and the alloy magazines were 20 grams lighter against his $2200 Kevlar vest. He mindlessly feels at his tactical pouch, he has a 10 year supply of testosterone cypionate in it, just in case the pharmacies get hit. He smirks, “Daddy needs his combat fuel.” He’s been on TRT for 7 years, his testes have cobwebs on them. He steps out of the bunker, he’s spent years training for this moment, doing weighted carries, getting “don’t tread on me” tattoos, bow hunting, having a beard. “It’s fuckin showtime.” He announces. Just then he feels something lightly tap his leg. He glances down. It’s a 17 dollar drone off temu. It has a decal on it. “Is that… hentai?” His legs are blown smooth off. 12 miles away in a disgusting room illuminated only by the degenerate glow of purple LED strip lighting, a 17 year old leans back in his cum stained gamer chair. He’s grown so frail and sickly his friends and family keep mistaking him for Asmongold. He grabs another 30mg vyvanse and washes it down with a cold chicken nugget. “GG faggot” He’s killed 500 men.
5am, Black Rifle Coffee consumed, Black Rifle Energy packed up, headed to the range
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It’s cool’n all. But they did it on stolen land. 🏴‍☠️
JUST IN: Elon Musk unveils the Tesla Roadster by launching it off a ramp before the car flipped in midair and safely landed on the ground. The car is a collaboration between Tesla and SpaceX. One of the most insane things I've ever seen.
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It’s got to be tough pretending the Roadster kick flip wasn’t American as fuq & cool as fuq.
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Replying to @OpenAINewsroom
"New OpenAI."
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This is a brilliant strategy. The man is far more than a simple cokehead.
BREAKING: 🇷🇺🇺🇸🇺🇦 Zelenskyy indicated that Ukraine would attack Russian ships carrying diesel to the US. Zelenskyy indicated that Trump needs to strike a deal with him if he wants Ukraine to refrain from attacking the oil tankers transporting diesel to the US.
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Replying to @PopBase
At this point, I need the mechanical bird to release its own statement. We’ve heard from everybody else. 💀
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Kelly Clarkson has our gift shop employee at gun point and will not leave until we sell her our animatronic pterodactyl
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Not JCred retweeted
No one: Not a single person: Not a soul in the world: Bryan Johnson:
I am measuring my girlfriend’s erections
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Proud of this one
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Not JCred retweeted
To the insensitive dicks making jokes, they lost 9 TRILLION rupees, that’s almost $14.
BREAKING: Indian stock market loses ₹9 lakh cr. so far Today
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Wait isn't the Indian economy about to embrace an enormous returning wave of their 99.9th percentile talent?
BREAKING: Indian stock market loses ₹9 lakh cr. so far Today
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Not JCred retweeted
My wife got pregnant by another man. It's been a challenging 9 months knowing he's not my son but I'm so excited to raise him like my own. Here's 5 things it taught me about being an Eagles fan: 👇
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