You can prioritise devotion or you can prioritise yourself, but you cannot prioritise both. If you are in the habit of choosing yourself, then you must give up devotion (meaning true love) because there is no room for ego in love - you cannot be pathologically selfish and self-preserving, and orient yourself around the adoration of another - it is not possible, for to choose another is to choose love, whilst to choose yourself is to reject it. You may think you like the idea of love, of romance, of devotion, of all these wonderful and fantastical things in your head - but when life requires sacrifice from you, when there is inconvenience, when you are scared, when you must prioritise another's well-being over your own self-preservation, when another's opinion matters more to you than you are perhaps comfortable with - can you hack it? No? If not, then give it up, because it's not for you. You think devotion is just some poetic indulgence - it is not. It is in fact, only for the fierce, courageous and the strong. Selfishness, being tactical, conceited, arrogant, egotistical, playing mind games - all these things - the way you date - the way you "love" - these are for the weak. They require nothing but fear and cynicism. They allow you to always put yourself first, to protect yourself first, and run away or screw someone over whenever you dislike something, are too grossly inconvenienced, scared or hurt. There are many women who dream of devotion, who fantasise about it, who model it, who give massive psychic real estate to it as a concept and have a large part of their interiority actively revolve around it, yearning, craving, desiring - but if you are not a warrior - if you are not willing TO DIE FOR YOUR LOVE - then give it up - because you are not fit to embody what you desire, and thus for you it is little more than mere psychic porn - you are not brave enough, not strong enough, not crazy enough to know and protect a love like that, because you have chosen safety, and with it, all the mediocrity that entails. True love is for the strong, which is why most of you will never know it. You will blame the world, and you will blame men - but you get precisely what you deserve. Look in the mirror. It contains all the answers you've been avoiding.