Lauren Ashley (@Mix_With_Vodka) header
Lauren Ashley (@Mix_With_Vodka) profile picture

Lauren Ashley

@Mix_With_Vodka

Welcome to my page. No one can hear you scream from here. *** Some of my tweets:https://nitter.gq/t.co/CL0jMk4bGk

 Chicago, IL
Joined February 2018
  • Tweets726
  • Following3.9K
  • Followers10.9K
1Media
Photo by Lauren Ashley (@Mix_With_Vodka)
⚡️ “Some of my tweets” by @Mix_With_Vodka nitter.gq/i/events/1141015796681… This is how bored I am…
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Lauren Ashley retweeted
Ginga Snappa (@GingaSnapppa) profile picture
Ginga Snappa@GingaSnapppa4 Nov 2015
Lots of us suffer in silence. You should try it.
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Diamonds are a girls best friend? You can’t even snort those!
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Him: I can’t tell if you’re being cute and joking or seriously calling me an idiot…? Me: The latter. I’ll give you a minute to look up what that means.
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It’s true what they say. You never know a good thing until it's gone... I miss quarantine SO MUCH
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If you ever find yourself being attacked by elderly women, just throw a handful of buttons on the floor. Old bitches love buttons.
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Do or do not. There is no... scenario where I give a fuck.
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People are like water. Transparent, tasteless and I’ll always choose vodka instead.
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Them: "Live in the moment!" Me: "HAVE YOU SEEN THIS MOMENT?"
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Oh, you organized your entire house? That’s cool. I haven’t showered in a week.
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Lauren Ashley retweeted
Fickle Filly (@Fickle_Filly) profile picture
Fickle Filly@Fickle_Filly2 Apr 2020
Humans: This sucks. Dogs: WHAT A TIME TO BE ALIVE!
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Quarantine Day 18: I mean, I guess I could try meth once.
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No fucking thank you Zoom, Skype or FaceTime. The world may be social distancing, but I’m still anti-social.
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Lauren Ashley retweeted
Anthony McHats (@TheHatStore) profile picture
Anthony McHats@TheHatStore7 Jun 2019
doctor: I'm going to take out your appendix me: oh okay *shouts at my belly* YOU HAVE A SUITOR
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Most grocery stores: A lot of shoppers wearing masks and gloves. Wal-Mart: 10 shoppers with no pants on.
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Me: Don’t touch me! Him: Oh right, because of the social distancing Me: No, because you’re ugly
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Let’s start eating Tide Pods again
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Lauren Ashley retweeted
Trey (@treydayway) profile picture
Trey@treydayway1 Apr 2020
Wish I had an Irish accent. A black dude with an Irish accent would get shit done
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Lauren Ashley retweeted
Tony (@tsm560) profile picture
Tony@tsm56026 Mar 2020
I just woke up and didn't know what day or time it was or what was even happening. Just like every other day
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