Not Ricky Ponting

My fake team of the decade... 1 @FakeShaneWatson 2 Eddie Cowan (so I can bat sooner) 3 @NotRickyPonting (c) 4 Bourbon 5 Wentworth Park 6 Coca Kohli 7 Mowbray 8 Swisse 9 P Siddy (only on his birthday) 10 The CrownBet horse 11 Boonie 12th man: Gary Pratt

Just trying to commentate a game with a bourbon in hand and @MarkHoward03 mentions Gary f'n Pratt... not happy. #BBL06

No way Murali Vijay gets a hundred if he was facing my medium pie-swingers. #INDvENG

Back on top where we belong. #bourbonoclock #AUSvNZ

I'm ageing with dignity. #pontingfashion #AUSvIND #noeyeballs

Too early for a bourbon?

Perhaps the only better fielder than me ever...and look at him now. #slipperyslope

I'm guessing Chris Rogers just won a bet. #reverseslog

When are these teams gonna name the trophy? May I suggest the Ponting-Kallis Cup? #safvaus

Stars coach tries to justify dropping my man Clint McKay. That's a selection choke if ever I've seen one. #BBL03 #stupid

Luke Wright's time with the Poms seems to have reminded him how to lose again. Nervous. Tentative. #BBL03

English collars tightening a little... #AUSvENG

I'm celebrating Australia Day with bourbon.

And he's a Tasmanian. #ausveng

Junior keeps looking at me and raising his eyebrows suggestingly. I'm a little worried. #BBL03