@SWTBlake

Proud husband, Dad, & Family Guy cutaway enthusiast. Live music is the best. Go Astros, Rockets, Texans, TXST, Arsenal, & Dynamo! BLM 🏳️‍🌈 🏳️‍⚧️ Pugs rule!

 Katy, TX
Joined July 2010
  • Tweets24.8K
  • Following638
  • Followers484
2.3KMedia
Some guy called me a “pussy” on my drive to work today. Right now, I am okay. But as someone who lives about 200 miles from where President Kennedy was assassinated, I am fearing for my life
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Giff retweeted
‏ً
@itsnwtsOct 26
As a former teacher, I never scrubbed in for a gender reassignment surgery, but I did instruct the kids on how to get the window screens off in case of an active shootėr.
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I do not think it’s hyperbolic to say this is one of the greatest Houston Rockets plays of all time.
The Bradeaux & Will Show@BradeauxAndWillOct 26
Is Amen Thompson's block on Wemby one of the greatest Houston Rockets plays of all time? 🔗 Watch the full video: youtu.be/QSX64FxaxSw
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Good morning. It’s October 26th and the Houston Rockets have more wins than the Houston Texans.
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Giff retweeted
UD@utahdolphinOct 26
Pat McAfee thinking he’s important enough to get assassinated is much funnier than anytime he’s taken his shirt off
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Brian Kelly when he heard the Baylor job was open:
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That was a great Giants win but also the kind of horrific loss that gets your coach finally fired.
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Amen said he could have been better on defense last season. Well he just made the best defensive play of his career!! Ball game. Just an incredible play by Amen
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Route 66 looks better in 𝗧𝘂𝗿𝗾𝘂𝗼𝗶𝘀𝗲. #GoLobos
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my homie died a virgin and they had me write his nobitchuary dawg i can't stop cryin
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#NewProfilePic
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Since 2013… 1,208 children have been shot at school. 0 children have received gender reassignment surgery at school. We've turned imaginary issues into national emergencies while turning a blind eye to real threats.
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(Takes her by the hand, looks deep into her eyes) Wife: “What’s up? Is everything okay?” Me: “It’s just that…Ever since the day that we met… Wanna get you wet, wanna make you sweat. Wanna make them walls in the room drip with precipitation. Girl, I'm trying to tell you now, we got a situation.” Wife: “I’m leaving you.”
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The Tyler Childers song in the field storm is cinema…..
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The Uecker/Harry Doyle angle alone would be incomprehensibly fantastic. The Major League reunions, Ueck nostalgia. The gifs, the memes. The memories If there is a God…she will approve
JP_YankeesGirl
@90syankskidOct 13
A Guardians-Brewers World Series would be the matchup Midwest baseball fans have been arguing into existence at family reunions for decades. Everyone’s drinking. Three aunts will bring competing salads without actual veggies. Someone’s uncle will provide a route between Cleveland and Milwaukee that “saves you 20 minutes” and takes nine hours. And, yes, there will be little smokies in a crockpot older than the starting pitchers. We’ve waited our whole lives for this. Get the good paper plates. I’m begging you, baseball God’s. #mlb #guardians #brewers #postseason
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Mr. Ohio
@MrOH1OOct 10
Florida beat an overrated Ole Miss team and everyone lost their shit. The dangers of letting people convince you that the SEC is better than it actually is.
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If i met you in person i guarantee i hugged like I’ve known you for years. 😊
MLFootball
@MLFootballOct 9
HEARTWARMING: #Bengals legendary wide receiver Chad Johnson spotted a fan wearing his jersey outside the stadium and went out of his way to surprise him. Ochocinco has always had a special relationship with his fans. This is what it is all about. 🥹🥹🥹
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Adam Schefter: “The Arizona Cardinals are trading Marvin Harrison Jr.” Everyone: “To where?” Adam Schefter:
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throwback to the time I took hours out of my day to decipher the rural juror finale song and make this karaoke-style lyric video and then never posted it bc it was strictly for my own personal enjoyment (until now bc I'm philanthropic like that)
c ☆@tintafeyOct 9
jane krakowski’s performance in 30 rock as jenna maroney is really one of the greatest of all time of all genres
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Dak fires it to Ferguson for the first down! Jake Ferguson:
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