Bridget Horton retweeted
me in the elevator with my friend who’s scared of being in elevators nitter.gq/drutejada/status/15741…
Bridget Horton retweeted
did I “kill a plant” or did the plant not have what it takes to thrive in this fast-paced environment
Bridget Horton retweeted
This is only some shit @badluckbridge would say 🤣😭🤣
Bridget Horton retweeted
At my funeral, take the bouquet off my coffin and throw it into the crowd to see who is next.
Bridget Horton retweeted
Hi this is an announcement for everyone with my number. Please leave me alone. I’m sick and I’m tired and really don’t have the energy to update everyone on everything I’m doing. If something happens, I will tell you. Until then, please let me rest. Thank you.
Bridget Horton retweeted
me: i read pets are important for home security
wife: omg are we getting a dog
me: *opening briefcase full of bees* bees
Bridget Horton retweeted
You never see these kings advertise. Just content to be in their own space, forever waging a cold war against each other with no shifting front lines. Respect.
Bridget Horton retweeted
there should be a post-pandemic full service doctor where you just lie down for a three hour appointment and five people swarm around and fix you like a race car































