deep okayness seems to be tractable and it is my favorite interest
Joined May 2023
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similarly, it seems like getting published papers is less about “are you smart and qualified” and more about “are you socially integrated into social circles that enjoy publishing papers”
oh it turns out people getting crushes on you in college is less about “are you a good person worthy of love” and more about “are you socially integrated into social circles that enjoy romantic interactions”
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it’s really interesting how much of neurosis is socially transmitted…. its almost as if we depend on others for sensemaking about what dangers we need to look out for!!
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if you are in tpot you need to be friends with productive premed students or else you will end up homeless without a job
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so it turns out that if you vividly imagine awesome parents taking care of you for a few hours, then you might finally be able to feel a positive emotion like lovingkindness and compassion instead of internally hitting yourself during meditation :)
attachment repair can be a really important prerequisite for many people having a hard time seeing lasting effects from e.g. parts work, meditation, etc!
@securetoexplore is trying to facilitate 250 hours of IPF sessions before the year ends and is looking for people who wanna try it out! he’s super fun and chill to work with and i can feel simple openhearted warmth without relying as much on luck now!
claude remote control is such a cool productivity improvement, only surpassed by voice-to-text in coolness
i can talk to claude while running or pooping or waiting in line for food
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i wish this wasnt true but this seems true
if this is a developmental thing that’s been there as long as someone can remember, often you need to borrow someone else’s capacity to feel emotions, which then slowly becomes internalized. basically, talking to another person on a consistent basis about your life is the rec here. ideally this would be someone like a therapist, a pastor, or other trained counselor, but a kind friend or partner is also great (but this can be difficult because if someone is having trouble feeling their emotions, they will also probably have trouble feeling either the goodwill or malevolence of others towards them, which means they often don’t have very supportive company around them and don’t even realize it).
having another emoting, empathetic nervous system around to co-regulate with is ideal, but in the absence of that, other ways of establishing an emotional “conversation” with non-human others can be effective. here i’m thinking of journaling, hanging out with animals or cultivating a relationship with nature, imaginal dialogue with internal figures, or deeply engaging with emotional works of art.
basically, establishing a relationship with a benevolent and understanding other is the name of the game. at first they hold the emotions you don’t have the capacity to consciously experience yet, and eventually the mind learns how to do that itself
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“goal is to see a normal thing more clearly, not to find a magic thing”
