These tweets may not be disseminated without the expressed, written consent of your mom. // I made @FilmSnuff
Joined May 2010
- Tweets3.9K
- Following263
- Followers15K
- Likes35.8K
Keating Thomas retweeted
People with good singing voices should not be allowed to do karaoke—sorry but it is not fun watching u do a lil Star Search performance, I’m here to see drunk Keith fight for his life thru “Livin on a Prayer” as god intended
Keating Thomas retweeted
I can’t believe they even gave Kramer the “Jeopardy!” host job in the first place.
Keating Thomas retweeted
Burning the American flag has been deemed free speech under the First Amendment. But I’d really like the Supreme Court to also weigh in on those who wear American flag boxer shorts.
Keating Thomas retweeted
Normal people talk about how Paul Rudd doesn’t age. The version of this for older, pretentious The New Yorker readers is Ken Burns.
Keating Thomas retweeted
I would never sign my dog up for one of those DNA tests because then her scions will be tracked by the government. Actually, they’ll probably all use iPhones by then, so who cares. Ya know?
Keating Thomas retweeted
Been thinking of weird stuff from growing up, and the game Twister was a pretty creepy game to randomly have 14 year olds play at parties. That game should only be for little kids or for 50-something swingers.
Keating Thomas retweeted
Hear me out. What if whether you are right or left handed was determined by which of your dad’s balls you came from?
Keating Thomas retweeted
Open the podcast doors, Dave, because we just released a NEW EPISODE about the 1968 classic Stanley Kubrick film, “2001: A Space Odyssey.” podcasts.apple.com/us/podcas…
Keating Thomas retweeted
NEW EPISODE OUT!
Uh oh! Definitely did "Rain Man," definitely did "Rain Man."
🎧 LISTEN HERE: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcas…
Keating Thomas retweeted
The fact that there are warnings like "Do not drink" on bottles of bleach makes me realise that Donald Trump can become president.
Keating Thomas retweeted
Man Just Buying One Of Every Cleaning Product In Case Trump Announces It’s Coronavirus Cure trib.al/KePOMb3
Keating Thomas retweeted
Check out this exchange I had with then private citizen @realDonaldTrump on Oct. 15, 2008. We spoke about House Speaker Nancy Pelosi and he then offered his thoughts about impeachment.
Keating Thomas retweeted
this Keating (an ugly ass name) guy: WhY LiBeRaLs HaTe JoKeR?
Liberals: we actually like the movie
him:
Keating Thomas retweeted
My favorite Famous-People-Names-That-Are-Also-Sentences are Tom Waits, Rosa Parks and Jeremy Irons. Are there any other good ones?
