Nicola Fontanive retweeted
Meanwhile literally walked into my gym cold, my first try ever doing this nonsense.
Did 3 reps with 30 lbs 😂😂😂
Btw I am 180 lbs and lift 3/4 time a week to stay in shape…
Your king is mid ✌️
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
Italian efficiency when it comes to coffee should be studied.
In Italy:
- Walk into a bar and look at the guy
- Un caffe
- 30 seconds later it’s ready
- Shoot it
- Leave €1
- Walk out
In the US:
- Join a line
- Wait
- Order coffee
- Answer 12 questions: Size? Milk? Roast? Sugar? Temperature? Colombia beans? Name? How do you spell it?
- $12.34
- Ask for a 20% tip. Click 5 times on a ipad to have a custom tip
- Tap phone
- ask where to send the invoice
- Wait again on a different line
- Someone call a name that sounds similar to mine
- get the coffee
- too hot, can't drink it
- finally at temperature
taste like shit
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
JD Vance is lecturing the Pope on Catholicism and Pierre Poilievre is lecturing Mark Carney on economics and RFK Jr is lecturing scientists about vaccines and Donald Trump is lecturing the world on tariffs and Pete Hegseth is quoting Pulp Fiction and thinking it’s the Bible
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
Told my wife to have dinner ready at 6 or I will obliterate her entire civilization.
She now charges me a fee to use the bathroom, that used to be free, and I didn't get dinner. WTF
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
Salesman: The car is $25k
Trump: $20k take it or leave it.
Salesman: No thank you. It’s $25k
Trump: okay fine, I’ll do $24k final offer.
Salesman: No thank you.
Trump: Fine I’ll give you $28k
MAGA: WOW ART OF THE DEAL!!!
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
Day 1: it's going to take a couple of days
Day 20: ok we need 200 billion dollars
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
Donald Trump this week (genuinely)?
Wednesday: Oil will never be cheaper.
Thursday: We've won.
Friday: They've nothing left.
Saturday: Can others please help us.
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
When you’ve crashed the economy, started a war, bombed a girls’ school, & raised gas & grocery prices beyond what people can afford… all in your first year as president. 😑
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
So basically we started a war with a country that can single-handedly fuck the entire world’s oil supply any time they want because of geography and we had no plan for if that happened? Is this correct?
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
Now that Obama’s poll numbers are in tailspin – watch for him to launch a strike in Libya or Iran. He is desperate.
Nicola Fontanive retweeted
The amount of egotistical people that think an Olympic winter games set in Italy should twist themselves into scheduling knots for US TV viewers is hilarious. It's not a TV event. It's a historic athletic competition. They don't care ur getting up at 8 am & watch. Nor should they