Prof @Cornell studying social influence, compliance & consent. Author, "You Have More Influence Than You Think" (2021) and "Should I Say Something?" (this Oct!)
Cornell University ILR School
Joined June 2011
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Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Speak up? Or not? In her new book, “Should I Say Something?”, Vanessa Bohns (@profbohns) offers a research-based guide to help people make better decisions about when to speak up and when to hold back. @HachetteUS @cornellilr news.cornell.edu/stories/202…
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Excellent article on grand romantic gestures!
Huge kudos to @ProfBohns, not only on this @TIME Magazine article, but also on the publication of her MAGNIFICENT new book, "Should I Say Something"!
If you want to know when to speak up, and when to stay quiet, this is *the* book!
"That’s the trouble with grand romantic gestures; they can make respecting someone’s wishes look like giving up too easily."
A @Time excerpt from Chapter 6 ("Should I Say I Love You?") of my new book.
time.com/article/2026/10/06/…
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
📢MY MAINSTAGE #TEDTALK JUST DROPPED📢
In 12.5 minutes, this talk distills the most important things I've learned in my 29 years as a relationship scientist.
Enjoy!
(And please share)
The secret to lasting love (Eli J. Finkel | TED2026) ted.com/talks/eli_j_finkel_t… via @TEDTalks
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Grand gestures are supposed to be romantic and uplifting, but in the real world, many of them would likely raise more concerns than spirits, writes Vanessa Bohns time.com/article/2026/10/06/…
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Why is it harder to think clearly when you're in the presence of someone who intimidates you?
Cornell psychologist Vanessa Bohns has spent her career studying the hidden influence we exert on others.
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
★ Vanessa Bohns aims to help readers navigate the dilemma of “desperately wanting to connect with others... while at the same time being terrified of putting your proverbial foot in your mouth.” Readers will find this both entertaining and deeply informative. @gcpbalance buff.ly/v9zS8HQ
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Why do you feel a knot in your stomach before asking a stranger for a favor?
Cornell psychologist Vanessa Bohns has an answer.
And it means you're walking around underestimating your influence on everyone you meet.🧵
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
A “real” yes? Even when an agreement meets the legal criteria for consent, individuals may not feel they’ve truly given consent, which can have serious consequences in the workplace, according to new @cornellilr research. @profbohns @sciencedirect news.cornell.edu/stories/202…
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Europeans: “I am holidaying. Your emails will be forwarded nowhere to be read by no one. Good day”
Americans:
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Available wherever you listen to podcasts or here: jayscherrbusinessconsulting.…
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Study (N=200 courses) tested 3 interventions to reduce gender bias in student evals, but none were effective. "Women who were tough graders or taught large classes received more criticism than men with the same grading style or class size." @kimelsesser
forbes.com/sites/kimelsesser…
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
🚨 We are hiring! 🚨
The OB department at the @CornellILR School is hiring a tenure-track faculty member with expertise in DEI for Fall 2025. Feel free to reach out to me if you have questions about the position or the department (both are amazing)!
academicjobsonline.org/ajo/j…
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
🥳 It's US publication day of The Laws of Connection! 🎉
Huge thanks to the team at @Pegasus_Books, and my US agent @zoepagnamenta for their faith and passion in this book.
I can't wait to hear readers' responses. Here are some early reviews from writers I admire 🧶
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Important but often overlooked: when groups differ a small amount in their means, they may differ *dramatically* in their tails.
For instance, in a personality study, we found males to have a little bit lower average compassion score than females (1.4 vs. 2)
[tails thread] 🧵
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Ghosting isn't always due to a lack of care. It’s often a misguided effort to avoid hurting someone.
Many people stop replying to shield others from pain. They don't realize being ignored is usually worse than being rejected.
Candor stings briefly. Silence leaves an open wound.
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
To get an authentic yes, give your employee room to say no. s.hbr.org/4avoNmL
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
Three ways to make a request that doesn’t feel coercive. s.hbr.org/4avoNmL
Vanessa Bohns retweeted
“We know that people find it hard to say no to requests because it is impolite to do so. By adding ‘please’ ... It is essentially saying to the target of the request: ‘Remember your manners,'” says @profbohns yahoo.com/lifestyle/how-freq…
