KJ retweeted
⚠️ Mischief cannot be held responsible for Google search results under “cockblock” outside of this spot ⚠️ @OkCupid bit.ly/347uBCW
KJ retweeted
🐓 🙅♀️
Not registering to vote is currently America’s biggest cockblock, according to @OkCupid.
KJ retweeted
'I never thought leopards would eat MY face,' sobs woman who voted for the Leopards Eating People's Faces Party.
KJ retweeted
No matter what happens tonight, the Indians are still from a city where this happens. deadspin.com/cleveland-man-t… #WorldSeries #Cubs #letsgo – at San Francisco, CA
KJ retweeted
But the thrill we've never known
Is the thrill that'll getcha
When you get your picture
On the cover of the
KJ retweeted
Amazing how the haters & losers keep tweeting the name “F**kface Von Clownstick” like they are so original & like no one else is doing it...
KJ retweeted
Still get nervous I’m going to get made fun of by children when I drive next to a school bus. I’m 35.
KJ retweeted
*tightens straps on electric chair*
Any last words?
-I think male oysters should be called boysters
Omg will someone throw the damn switch
KJ retweeted
Happy Chris #ColumbusDay. I'm not sure why we need a day off to celebrate the director of Home Alone, but I'll take it.
KJ retweeted
The best end to a long, hard-won life full of amazing stories would of course be a one-paragraph obituary with zero adjectives.
